Girls, do you orgasim almost always during intercourse?

[matius]

I realize it all depends, but if you're capable, does it happen almost every time?

 

If so, what do you believe it is about the guy or what he's doing that makes it click? Are there any common or recurring techniques the guy uses that help you out, or are the movements always different?

 

I'm with this girl now that can orgasm during sex, but not with me. She says nobody has ever turned her on so much, but as you can imagine - I'm not feeling the love. She says she's satisfied as well, but I'm not. Overall, everything she does says she's in to me.

 

I ask this because I feel I've missed the memo or the guide book, these other guys can but I can't. We've talked about it, but not trying to put too much pressure on it - i want to learn.

 

Thanks!

[MarkD]

Have you tried to ask her for "instructions" while having sex? Ask her to vocalize her feelings. Have you tried different positions?

[Emily100]

I pretty much always have an orgasm during sex however, the more attracted to the man I am the easier it is for me to have an orgasm and a better one. When a man is romantic and tells me he loves me that a sure fire, guranteed orgasm for me. Of course, he has to mean it, not just say it. I can't ascribe it to any particular technique.

 

I suggest you talk to the girl you're with and ask HER what would help as its her issue.

[Jd1983]

Most of the time, I can have an orgasm during sex - not every single time though. However, a majority of the time it's also with clitorial stimulation.

 

Have you asked her what you can do to make things better for her? Different things works for different people. Clearly she should know what she likes and don't like.

 

Good luck!

[matius]

Sure, we've talked. But she says it's different each time. Hard to comprehend that others just "get it" when there's no set rules like that.

 

Another problem being, the more turned on she is... The more I am so it's tough to keep on after a while. All of this is making sex more of a pain than pleasure.

 

It could be something about me is blocking it, but all signs physically or not show undivided interest.

[Jd1983]

Even if it's different each time, there should be at least one way to make her really feel it.

 

I think it's more about trial and error.

[ghostdog]

Sure, we've talked. But she says it's different each time. Hard to comprehend that others just "get it" when there's no set rules like that.

 

Another problem being, the more turned on she is... The more I am so it's tough to keep on after a while. All of this is making sex more of a pain than pleasure.

 

It could be something about me is blocking it, but all signs physically or not show undivided interest.

 

well the more turned on you are- that means if you're a minute man- that you have to spend most of the time pleasing her body...THEN you get yours...

 

try this- if you're a minute man...learn her body and when her orgasm comes...

 

stimulate her all you can(without penile penetration)...then put yourself inside of her so that you and she can cum either together or about the same time....

[catwalk]

It's something like 10% of women that can orgasm from penetration. i know I can't (with sex alone) but doesn't mean i don't enjoy it.

I had to let my new (young) bf know that he can't just stick it in me & say "cum for me" & expect me to do that, or that any woman who did was faking!

[matius]

Minute-man is a demeaning phrase for a very complex set of issues. Sex has become so stereotyped by the media and people in general it's no wonder people have performance issues. People should have a bit of empathy for this difficult problem that has very few solutions. It has severe affects on ones quality of life.

 

I don't know if I am necessarily but in the course of 30 minutes I will need to stop & start a handful of times to keep on.

[matius]

This girl can and has with past partners.

[ghostdog]

Minute-man is a demeaning phrase for a very complex set of issues. Sex has become so stereotyped by the media and people in general it's no wonder people have performance issues. People should have a bit of empathy for this difficult problem that has very few solutions. It has severe affects on ones quality of life.

 

I don't know if I am necessarily but in the course of 30 minutes I will need to stop & start a handful of times to keep on.

 

just trying to help out...

 

not meaning to flame.

[matius]

Oh I know, didn't mean to make it sound like so. Appreciate the advice. It's difficult to adequately describe the frustration of this issue.

[Baldey]

well the more turned on you are- that means if you're a minute man- that you have to spend most of the time pleasing her body...THEN you get yours...

 

try this- if you're a minute man...learn her body and when her orgasm comes...

 

stimulate her all you can(without penile penetration)...then put yourself inside of her so that you and she can cum either together or about the same time....

 

Dont listen to this guy . I know ur trying to help, but thats not the way. Many men are "minute men" but only about 5% of these men have something physically wrong with them. For the other 95% the problem is psychological. THis is what helped me go from 2-5 minutes when i was a virgin, to 20-60 minutes now a year later. Dont think about anything but the moment, become immersed in it. Forget all other thought. Being turned on doesn't lead to ejaculation, tension does. Relax. The worst thing u can do is think about your performance, which can be hard to do in your situation.

 

Ghostdog was right about one thing that will help u with that though. Make sure to give her as much pleasure as you can before hand. That will help you not worry about your performance during intercourse, as your job persay is done. Learn to give good oral. Theres tones of helpful info on this around. Heres some tips: DONT tense your tongue. leave it relaxed, and use the middle wide part, NOT the tip. dont go after the clit too aggressively, start slow, lick and kiss the surrounding areas first. When she starts moaning and bucking her hips, DONT STOP or change what ur doing. Keep doing the same, even after your tongue falls off and your jaw feels like its next. Dont stop! at that point ur almost there. If you stop, go faster, or slow down at that point, she wont orgasm. Try fingering her during. When fingering always use two fingers, and make sure your nails aren't long or sharp. dont focus on the fingering, but rather the oral. just putting a good amount of pressure downwards with your fingers while you eat her out will do more then poking at it a thousand times a minute. that will just be annoying and leave her sore. Dont be afraid to give it a good amount of pressure, its sturdy, you wont hurt her but instead give her the feeling of being "full".

 

As far as orgasms from penetration, my girl gets them when i go in form behind while shes laying flat on her stomach legs close together. I find in this position its easier to go a long time, and requires much less tension. Another position shes guaranteed to orgasm in is when shes on top, laying down over me. She doesn't like this one, says its almost unfair how easy it is for her to cum there. I tell her the view of her breasts is amazing and makes up for it, but she wont believe me Have her kneel over you and lay down on top of you, hold her ass down, and move ur hips in and out. It takes a while to cum in this position for me as well. The fastest position for me to cum in is missionary with me on top. Also make sure to tell her how you feel about her, that shes sexy and beautiful, and let her know how mcuh your enjoying the sex (body language helps most here imo). That helps girls orgasm im pretty sure.

[oldenoughtoknow]

Really great advice from Baldey. Many women like to hear sexy talk. Like anything else in the bedroom, you'll know if she's into it by her response. I've found that some women don't care for it early on, but after things get steamy a few well placed naughty words can really increase her, ahem, enthusiasm. Another great piece of advice from Baldey is on how long you try something. When you're nibbling on her neck and ears, you can tell right away where her sensitive spots are...but that tact rarely works anywhere else on her body.

 

You definitely want to try different things to see what drives her crazy. But whether its oral or regular sex, don't change the pressure, angle, speed, depth, etc., every 10 seconds searching for a good response. You'll never get it. Find something and do it for at least one minute. Then you'll get an accurate read. Women's orgasms aren't like a light switch that explodes when you find the right rhythm. They build slowly and if you're changing up the tempo every 10 seconds, you may cruise past three or four techniques that would get her there, if you would have only stuck with one of them.

 

As far as orgasm from penetration, having her on top is usually the easiest because she can control exactly what she wants. This is also a really good training video for you to learn from. What part of her vagina is she putting the most pressure on? What is the speed? What is the depth? What is the angle? Pay attention - she's giving you a road map to orgasm city for the next time you're in control. About half of the women I've been with could orgasm from penetration from the missionary position. I've found that if she doesn't come within five minutes of penetration, she isn't going to that go round. But again, choose a tempo and stick with it to have any chance of success.

 

Have fun exploring. And don't worry, this is supposed to be fun!

[matius]

Yea, killer advice that's really appreciated!! Happy New Year to all.