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Girlfriend gone to University, feelings...


fadedocean

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Hi its been a while since I've posted on these forums. I'm not really expecting any advice as such, i just feel better if i just talk about what's bothering me.

 

My Girlfriend of 9 months has gone to Uni, literally moved her in at the weekend . she is only about an hours drive away, but its a lot farther than we're used to. It was quite emotional for us both as you can imagine...and i already feel really lost without her lol.

 

We spent a lot of time together over the past 9 months, on holiday, at each others houses almost everyday and now she has gone...I've got to try and adjust back to my life without her here with me all the time. I trust her obviously, but I'm worried that even though i may see her at the weekends it might change our relationship and we might grow apart.

 

I wondered if anyone else was going through this too and how they feel.

 

Cheers

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If you have a strong relationship, with deserved trust - then it will get stronger. you've got to do things to not let your mind wander though, that is where the danger is.

 

If you sit around and think of only her, you will bother her, and you will ruin it. trust me

 

an hour really isn't bad. people that live in the same city can easily be an hour apart. don't just count on weekends. there will be mondays and tuesdays where it will be worth it to drive out at night and sleep at a motel if necessary. you can make it work...

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An hour away isn't too bad! It feels like a sudden split because you used to be able to just go over and see her - but think of it more as a change of proximity.

Distanced relationships can work just as well - but what you really need to ask is when you can see one another, arrange times that are good for both of you, and in the meantime - live your own life! It'll be a lot more fun if when you meet up for the first few times, you have lots to tell her about.

Going to university is going to be scary for her, but also something new and exciting.

I'm currently there - and know a lot of girls who have a boyfriend at home. The good thing is, since university has lots of holidays, lots of free days and things like that - you'll have plenty of time to see one another!

For now though, encourage her to enjoy herself, and although I know it sucks when you realise you can't just go round to see her - if you arrange meeting times, you'll have a time to look forward to.

 

Don't worry! Relationships over a distance can definitely work, you guys will be fine as long as you both put the effort in, and keep in contact.

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My Girlfriend of 9 months has gone to Uni, literally moved her in at the weekend . she is only about an hours drive away, but its a lot farther than we're used to.

I currently live an hour away from my boyfriend. We used to be about a half an hour away before my parents decided to move to another state. Hell, when I transferred colleges, I was 3 hours away from him.

 

It's really not as bad as you think it is and I am dealing with it quite well. You two will be fine! Yes, it is an adjustment, but it's not as bad. Be lucky she isn't 3 hours away, lol!

 

I trust her obviously, but I'm worried that even though i may see her at the weekends it might change our relationship and we might grow apart.

The more you worry about this part, the farther you will drive her away. Stop worrying about it and just have FUN with the relationship.

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  • 2 years later...

I go to college out of state and I'm currently 3 hours away from my boyfriend. I *wish* it was one, I would drive town to see him a lot more! hehe. He lives at home but commutes to college for classes.

 

We talk a LOT everyday, throughout the day, but that's just how we are. I don't worry about him and he doesn't worry about me. I think the distance has actually allowed us to get closer, if that makes sense. I see him 1-2x a month, so not that bad.

 

As long as there is an end to the distance at some point (for me, it's this Spring) it's doable.

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