I Have Fallen Out Of Love

[Rob1000]

I think this past week has been strange. There's been a lot of conflicting emotions whizzing through my head. This day last week I felt great, truly believing I was falling out of love with my ex, and was relieved that I was out of a damaging relationship. I had let go of any hope of reconciliation because I'd realised that now the dust is settling on the new chapter in my life, I actually didn't want to go back.

 

It's been over 7 months since we broke up and I haven't even seen her since. I've only heard her voice briefly in that time, so in all honesty she is just a stranger to me now.

 

So how have I realised I'm not in love with her anymore? I wrote a song for her when we broke up. I was barely able to play it before without breaking in to tears. Now I hardly feel any emotion at all when I play it. I'm looking at pictures of her, and I really don't feel all that much. It's like looking at a stranger. Having said this, I do feel an affinity towards her, but it's definitely not the 'in love' feelings I had before. To be honest, I don't think I was still in love with her when we broke up because I had been questioning myself for about 2 months prior to our split. I only fell back in love when I lost her, wanting what I no longer had. My story is here if you want a read...

 

 

 

I was due to marry this girl in little over 2 weeks. Am I still sad? Yes. Do I still miss our relationship? Yes. I am still full of regrets? Kinda. I am still in love with my ex? Almost definitely not.

 

Onwards and upwards people!!

[Nidania]

Your story gives me hope. You are healing wonderfully from this relationship, and should be proud of yourself!

 

You're right, October 3rd is going to be a strange day for you. But after reading your story about the breakup and reading where you are now... you've come a long way. I like how you used the word "relieved" when describing how it feels to be out of the relationship. That's the feeling I am waiting to experience in my own life.

 

Thank you again for sharing your story. You've helped me more than you know today.

[Rob1000]

Your story gives me hope. You are healing wonderfully from this relationship, and should be proud of yourself!

 

You're right, October 3rd is going to be a strange day for you. But after reading your story about the breakup and reading where you are now... you've come a long way. I like how you used the word "relieved" when describing how it feels to be out of the relationship. That's the feeling I am waiting to experience in my own life.

 

Thank you again for sharing your story. You've helped me more than you know today.

You're welcome Nidania. It is still hard, but I can see the sun coming up over the horizon and it has the rest of my life coming in to view along with it. Stay strong!

[nj101]

i was going to post something on this.

 

I have been no contact with my ex for a few weeks now, initiated this time by me although there have been previous times where we each just stopped talking to eachother so it had been a rocky relationship.

 

All i do is think about her, at night, first thing in the morning, i mean just as i am waking up. i replay all the things that i could have done differently every day.

 

I just cant believe that two people so in love (and we really were for a very long time) could stop feeling that way towards each other.

 

She had moved on previously once but i asked for reconciliation and she accepted but she was completely closed off during that period which left me battered.

 

I just dont know how i am ever going to not feel like she wasnt the one. i honestly thought i would be with her forever. we had our problems sure but nothing was major and a lot of the things thinking back now were things i could have corrected (there were things she could have corrected too).

 

If i were to start dating again i do not know how i wouldnt compare everyone to her, she was perfect for several years and i think i was near perfect for her. she always left me notes everywhere, bought me gifts all the time for no reason. constantly showed me affection and love.

 

I feel like she was on a time frame that was one or two years ahead of myself. she was in love first, and she was the one who has come to terms with it ending first.

 

I just dont understand how she is ok with me not being in her life, and how she thinks that i will be ok with her not being in mine.

 

How do i come to terms with this? it is killing me

[Rob1000]

Be very glas that you didn't do the wife and kids thing

link removed

Kids was one thing that bugged me and probably made both of us realise that we probably weren't right for one another. I never wanted to be 'ordinary', just because society told me I had to be.

[Rob1000]

Time, dude. That's all I can say. Even now, no one comes close to my ex. I still love her and idealise her in many ways but I did the same thing to my previous exes also, so I realise that the next serious gf is a long way off for me. I'm not going to rush anything. I'm just riding on that wave now and I'm going to see where it takes me.

[rebelfac]

I am also in the same boat and have learned a great deal from this very painfull lesson. One thing I have learned is not to put all of my eggs in one basket. I definitely don't plan to ever get married again. I now value my friends a lot more. Nothing lasts forever and you don't usually get second chances. NC is a hard thing to do but being in contact didn't work for me.

[mr.mac]

I'm just riding on that wave now and I'm going to see where it takes me.

Was this an intentional reference to Release by Pearl Jam? I hope so!

 

Anyway, you're doing great! Baby steps, right?

[Rob1000]

Was this an intentional reference to Release by Pearl Jam? I hope so!

 

Anyway, you're doing great! Baby steps, right?

Ha! No mate, I've never even heard that song, but I'm going to dl it now!!