Is there no way?

[alonealone]

Is there no way to get someone back when they won't even talk to you? Or at least get some closure? She want return my calls, so I stopped calling her. She doesn't return my emails. We passed each other driving by once and I could tell she avoided looking in my direction. She won't even let me know why she broke it off.

 

I'm sure the answer is "She's Crazy!" At least that's what everyone else thinks.

 

Never has any girl just said "bye" to me with no reason.

 

I guess I should just let it go.

 

I want so bad to send her one last email saying "if you are going to treat me like this then I don't want to talk to you anyway" but I don't won't to be an ass, even though she deserves it.

 

Seems like the only time she ever has really listened is when I just got mad and stood up for myself.

 

It would at least give me some closure.

 

Anyone have an opinion?

 

thanks,

[tRiKTa]

Hi alonealone i think you're right this girl is a bit crazy I think the way she is acting towards you is selfish and immature. You should definatley let it go you sound like a nice guy so its her loss. I think you should go for it and send that last email tell her your feelings lay into her whatever man just get it off your chest that one last email which gets everything in the open but doesn't matter if she replies or not. So after that you can move on and meet other girls and forget about this ex who is obviously not worth your time and effort.

[HeavenLee]

Hi alonealone!

 

I am going to approach this from a different angle. The simple fact is this: the signs she is giving you is that she does not want to be with you, and she does not want to even contact you in anyway. Whatever the reason, that is her choice, and you have to respect that. Although in a perfect world you would understand her motives and get the answers, it is not a perfect world and the truth is, no matter how bad we want it, we just gotta realise that we don't always get the answers we are looking for.

 

I understand everyone's need for closure. But think about this... will the answers change the outcome of the situation? will they make you feel better, or will they hurt you even more, and possibly only start up more questions and confusion? will the answers benefit you in anyway? will they help you accept the reality of the situation and cope any better?

 

While you may think the answers will help, they will probably only hinder your progress. What happened, happened. Sometimes life is just like that, and some things were not meant to be. Sometimes people's feelings change seemingly overnight, and it's no one's fault. It's not her fault that she has chosen to not be with you... it's her personal choice. True, she should have done the right thing and perhaps talked it through with you, but there are people in this world that are less than honourable, and there is nothing you can do to change that.

 

The thing you need to work on now, is acceptance. You need to stop looking backwards and trying to figure it out, because it is not going to help you in anyway. You need to look forward and start healing yourself so that you have the chance to move on to the person who you were REALLY meant to be with. I know it's hard to stop the questions, which is why you need to convince yourself that they will do you no good. And it's not relevant now. Start healing and getting yourself back together and on track to start again. If she wants to come back, she will have to do so of her own accord... not because you are trying to convince her.

 

Please be good to yourself and don't torture yourself with questions that you may never find the answers to. I wouldn't even bother to send the email - it will serve no real purpose... and if she doesn't respond, it will only make you angrier/more hurt/ more confused etc. Don't give her the satisfaction... after all, she did not give you what you needed. Just accept the facts as they are, realise that you can't change them, and get the best revenge by moving on to a happier and better life without her...

 

 

Good luck!!!

[lawandorder]

hello there. I have been able to read alot of your posts. You seem very smart on alot of aspects to all this pain. What would it take for you to speak to me on the phone. You can read my posts. I have had heck with all this and really this computer is all I have to talk to about my issues. I would just love to have someone to tell my story to and get some real advice from some one that is not gong to take sides. I will follow any advice you give. I wont get mad if it fails but you have better advice than me. I just really need some help and I dont think God is going to have a heart to heart with me. Thanks if you would.

[brando]

Unfortunately no, there is no way to get someone to talk to you if they do not want to. Sorry.

[hecka_bekah]

I just want to say that you're definitely not alone. I'm in the same boat myself and am having difficulty accepting that my ex wants nothing to do with me. Reading your post actually made me feel a little better because I see more clearly what I need to do when other people are going through a similar situation.

 

We both have to hang on to the fact that our exs cannot understand who we are. Why do we want to be with people who cannot understand us? Why do we waste our time blaming ourselves for their lack of compassion? They are the ones who are running away from their problems. We are part of their reality which they do not choose to accept. At least we are that much closer to changing for the better.

 

It's nice to see how giving of a person you are. What you have done in this situation shows much character. Don't beat yourself up for trying as hard as you have to make things work. You'll find someone who appreciates your dedication and will love you for that.

 

In the mean time try to remember how different the two of you are. Ultimately, you cannot be happy with someone who is that unappreciative of you. Good luck and I wish you the best!

 

Rebekah