What am I doing wrong?

[CaseOfInsanity]

I showed an interest to a girl recently and I asked my friends how if I would suit her. Then they said no chance. She didn't seem to show any interest back anyway so I decided to move on, but then she's like avoiding me since then and it's pretty much the same old story of my life. No one seems to want to tell me what's going on and I don't want to look like a fool by telling people I'm not trying to hit on them.

 

I have come to realize some of my problems like being a bit awkward (note : not so much) when talking to girls I'm interested in although I feel that I should be able to talk to them like how I talk to guys like other guys do. I feel that not saying much also makes me look boring and unattractive. Also when people insult me I don't come up with good comeback and I might look lower status. I feel like coming back with something clever but I can't think of one at that moment like other people do.

 

I just wanted to throw out what I'm thinking right now and get some feedback which would hopefully be helpful.

[shikashika]

Are you over thinking everything too much?

 

Maybe your friends said that just because they thought you weren't suited.. or SHE seemed like a doofus. Why did your friends say no way?

[CaseOfInsanity]

Are you over thinking everything too much?

 

Maybe your friends said that just because they thought you weren't suited.. or SHE seemed like a doofus. Why did your friends say no way?

 

I'm probably overthinking. I know I should go out and talk with people more often but changing your way you have been for all your life isn't easy. (even though I try)

 

My friends said it wasn't going to work because they said pretty much I'm out of her league like popularity and looks.

[Sirquacksalot]

Well, I'll be the one to throw out the useless information I guess: Confidence is key. Girls like a guy who's confident in himself, more aptly in his ability to show her a good time and be fun and spontaneous and an excellent conversationalist. Show weakness in any of these areas, forget about it. One thing I'll mention here that everyone else seems to fail to is that while confidence is key, that's only if there's a pre-existing attraction. Like you said, she 'showed no interest'. Game over, move on, find someone who shows some interest, and use that knowledge of 'shes shown some interest' to build the confidence you'll need to seal the deal.

 

As for the avoidance afterwords... well, yeah, they'll do that sometimes. Its much easier for a girl (especially a 'pretty' one) to get away with being stuck-up like that and calling the guy 'a creep' or 'weirdo' or 'loser' and thereafter avoiding him. I've seen some of my women friends do this countless times to poor guys who had the misfortune of simply asking if they could buy her a drink. I guess its part of life and the lesson to be learned is: Pick your time and girl. Before asking after any girl you've been friendly with, or know in any way, be prepared for her to cut off all contact with you if you get rejected, and then balance the 'I really like her as a friend' value vs 'I'd like to date her' value.