When you "think" there's another ...

[lifeisaparadox]

Hey guys. What do you guys do when you think there is another girl and your significant other does not mention her at all?

 

The thing is, my boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year, and we're at the point where we basically tell each other almost anything. I know most of who his friends are (though I may have not met them all), and vice versa, so I completely trust him when going out.

 

I think I'm being too clingy, but this is my first time actually worrying about him cheating or something.

 

Mainly because I went away for a trip with the family & one of my friends told me that she saw my boyfriend and this girl together, ALONE, at the mall. I know OF her, due to mutual friends, but I've never personally met her, so I know for a fact who she is.

 

Then here's the other part -- my boyfriend told me, during my trip, that a girl he recently met (though he never named her), encouraged him to cheat and not tell because I was on a trip.

 

So am I just being too worried? I'm afraid to confront him because I don't usually sound so clingy.

[Cognitive_Canine]

Why wouldn't he name her? I hope he doesn't plan on staying friends with a girl who is trying to get with him.

 

Is your friend sure she saw your boyfriend. 100% sure. Even then, it was probably just a friend of his.

 

Maybe mention "oh hey, so and so said saw you at the mall on this day. Did you see her?" and gauge his response.

[ay0_x]

It's not clingy. You have a right to know, just don't say it in an aggressive tone.

[arcadefire]

Mainly because I went away for a trip with the family & one of my friends told me that she saw my boyfriend and this girl together, ALONE, at the mall. I know OF her, due to mutual friends, but I've never personally met her, so I know for a fact who she is.

 

Then here's the other part -- my boyfriend told me, during my trip, that a girl he recently met (though he never named her), encouraged him to cheat and not tell because I was on a trip.

 

So am I just being too worried? I'm afraid to confront him because I don't usually sound so clingy.

 

Those two things are red flags! Your boyfriend shouldn't be alone in the mall with some other girl other than you. And then to tell you that someone encouraged him to cheat... what the...

[Resolute]

Those two things are red flags! Your boyfriend shouldn't be alone in the mall with some other girl other than you. And then to tell you that someone encouraged him to cheat... what the...

 

 

I have to humbly disagree, I can speak from experience on both sides about just the very same topic. I am a guy and I have many female friends id spend time with at the mall, its just a big store - it doesnt have to be some lovecapade when you go to the mall, and although friends may have saw them alone, it may mean nothing.

I have been asked to cheat on my girlfriend, but i disagreed of course, and she has had the opportunity to do the same, we have both told eachother and in my opinion unless you have insecurity issues, you should see it as strengthening the relationship if they can trust you to not freak out about it and realize they're only in it for you. (and i love honesty, absolutely love it to bits)

[thistime]

if you tell each other everything, then it shouldnt be that difficult to tell him about what you heard/saw/were told, and ask him about the circumstances. Try not to be defensive or accusatory...just ask.

[Jd1983]

If something is on your mind and it's bothering you - then I strongly suggest that you talk to your boyfriend about it. He can ease your mind, and you can let out your frustrations. If you tend to talk about other things within your relationship, I don't see a reason why you shouldn't talk to him about this. It's not a matter of being clingy, it's a matter of open communication on both sides. I say go for it!