Initiating sex

[gilfer]

Would it be a dealbreaker if your partner never initiated sex despite having a normal sex drive (however you define normal sex drive) in a relationship?

[waveseer]

It depends on how responsive he was when I initiated. Ultimately, if he wanted sex when I did and was enthusiastic I don't think I'd have any problem saying when. I would just hope he could keep up with me.

[Speranza]

Yes, it would for me. Provided that we had talked about it and I'd expressed my needs in a non-threatening way, possibly more than once.

 

It's simply that although I am a very giving person, for me one 'proof' of someone's interest is if it occurs to them to 'want me' without being asked. If I always initiate, I eventually begin to feel that they aren't interested. (And I think that's often the case, though men can become lazy when they are comforatble in a relationship).

 

I've pondered this long and hard but it's simply a need I have, and not an unreasonable one. At a very basic level, it's like someone never offering to do the dishes! lol

[Anonybrit]

My ex almost never initiated sex with me. In 2 years, with the exception of the first month or two together, I could count the number of times she initiated on one hand, literally. It got me down a lot.

[mr.mac]

Yes, it would for me. Provided that we had talked about it and I'd expressed my needs in a non-threatening way, possibly more than once.

 

It's simply that although I am a very giving person, for me one 'proof' of someone's interest is if it occurs to them to 'want me' without being asked. If I always initiate, I eventually begin to feel that they aren't interested. (And I think that's often the case, though men can become lazy when they are comforatble in a relationship).

 

I've pondered this long and hard but it's simply a need I have, and not an unreasonable one. At a very basic level, it's like someone never offering to do the dishes! lol

 

I couldn't agree with this more! It's not that I need my girl to want sex I just want her to want to have sex with me.

[npsgnome]

yep, thats a deal breaker alright! it has to be a 2 way street!