My Girlfriend had too much of me?

[ForAnother]

I think I am losing my girlfriend. Last night we were talking on the phone and she was telling me all about what she is doing this weekend. First of all it was MONDAY night. Very soon in the week to tell me her plans... very odd for her to do that. Second of all, her plans really weren't involved. Like going over to a friends house and watching a movie, and then taking 2 friends out for dinner. They just aren't that big but she was excentuating on what she was doing... so I took it as a deliberate "I am doing what I want this weekend."

 

Well her problem like 1 month ago was that we were together too much. So we took a week off of seeing each other. Called like 3 times during the week. So then we spent 2 weeks together following that. So she is tired of me. I am not tired of her, but usually its hard for me to get tired of doing something.

 

So then today, we were at school. I said "ugh I forgot to buy the prom tickets" and she replied "I doubt you will buy them." I was just blown away that she said that. Then we had an argument that the tickets had JUST come out today. She got all mad that I checked up on it. Stupid, it pissed me off. Then we were walking back, and I just plain out asked her "Is this weekend deliberately to get away from me?" She then started giving me all this babble about how we spend too much time together. I agreed to it and then kissed her and headed on my way.

 

So is this a "I wanna separate from you for a bit" or is this a "break up time"

 

Do I call her tonight, or should I wait for her to call me?

 

I am always the one to go to her locker in the morning, do I just wait and talk with friends instead of going to her locker?

 

Its like a catch 22. If I go to the locker, it will be like I am still trying to see her all of the time. If I don't go to the locker she will think I am playing a childish game of "You hurt me once so I am going to back away" I don't know what to do.

 

Do I just avoid her at this point, because we are still dating.

 

Maybe a good talk about this will help... What are things that I should say. Like "Are you mad at me?" or "Tell me whats going through your head about us" or "I am confused (and give all my examples)"

 

I am the older one in the relationship and I have NO clue what to do at this point.

 

Thanks for all your support.

 

ForAnother

[Beec]

Look at the post right below yours. Different ages, similar issues.

 

Don't go have a talk. Be nice, be decent, but withdraw a little either physically or emotionally.

 

Then go make her feel great. Turn it on and turn it off and on and off.

[Sn0man]

Yup...your issue is similar to mine. Give her some breathing room and some time to think. Im no expert as, like i said, i have the same little problem, but I think it'll make her come around.

 

So don't call her and don't go to her locker in the morning, just to see what happens.

 

Best of luck

[bzborow1]

Man stop being a wussbag!!!!!! Basically you are smothering her, and then making it worse by acting all weird about it.

 

I think you should take this weekend to go out and do something with your buddies....and forget about her (for the weekend). As for what to do about her. Just be cool. Don't bring up the weekend, in fact don't talk about the relationship AT ALL.

 

You need to learn to let things happen naturally. So my best advice would be to be cool w/her....let her go and do what she wants w/o saying anything....go out with your buddies....and just be cool and play it by ear.

[ophelan]

If you really like this girl (and even if you hate her), give her the space she wants. Smothering her is quite possibly one of the greatest causes for ruining relationships, and it is difficult to deal with. When she gets unhappy (due to the smothering), you want to spend time with her to make her happy. And then the cycle repeats, until you get tossed to the curb.

 

BREAK THE CYCLE!

 

Be the strong man she wants you to be and give her space. She'll come back, and she'll want you more than she ever has. Give her what she wants, and spend time with her. Just don't overdo it; save time in your life for you and your friends.

 

There is a reason that on TV you always see the single guys spending time with women every night, and the married guy hits the bar with his buddies a couple nights a week. To have a successful relationship, you both NEED to spend some time apart. Tell her to have fun this weekend, and that you'll talk to her later.

 

Ophelan

[ForAnother]

Thanks burrow and ophelia, your suggestions have been very true and very helpful. i guess that is what I need to do, learn to be strong and just let things happen as they need to. Alright party on!

 

ForAnother