I want to move on but I don't think I know how

[forsaken]

My boyfriend broke up with me and I want to move on. Well sometimes I think I want to move on but most of the time I just hope and pray that he would just come back. I've tried to seek advice from others, I've even tried comparing my relationship with others but I always end up still wanting him back. I wasn't ready for him to leave. I was comfortable with our relationship, so comfortable in fact, that I didn't plan living without him. How could he just up and leave me? What did I do? I loved him so much I still do and I know it may sound stupid of me but I still wait on his return. Everyone thinks I've moved on and I led them to think that only to spare myself from the criticism. But deep down I stiil want him. I thought that after two years this feeling would somehow go away but it won't, it haunts me every single day. I know it sounds like an obsession but please understand I gave him my heart and he left without giving it back. Sometimes I sit in bed thinking of how he hurt me and wonder why I still want him. I wonder why would anyone want someone that dont want them, but I just do. I miss him. I think he left me because I gained weight when I had our son. But he could have just left because one day he woke up and wonder what the hell he was doing with this ugly girl. Just listening to this is making me feel dumb. I just want to move on, he did. He got married. How could he marry her when I love him. And why do I love him and he married her. That would be the last straw for any sane person, but not me, what is it going to take for me to let him go. I don't want to let him go I want him to come back. God help me!

[Gerhard]

I really feel for you. First of all, everybody that tells you to, "get over it", move on", "forget about him", well, to hell with them, I know it's not that easy and frankly, it just doesn't work that way. You should take some time out to grieve the lost of a loved one. I know this means not much to you, but we've all been there, and we know it hurts like a bitch. Funnily enough, you might not know it now, but I know it, one morning you will wake up again smiling. I've been through a similiar situation (minus the child), sometimes I thought I was physically going to die of heartbreak, but it's at times like that where you gotta keep on fighting and remember all the good things you have in your life (your child should be more than enough reason). God trusted your strength enough to entrust you with a child, don't let your child down with you being depressed all the time !!

 

It's ESSENTIAL that you introduce a change in lifestyle, if you are as overweight as you think you are, join a gym or take up running. Just make sure that you get obsessed with something fun in your life. Try to spend as much time as possible with your child and new hobby, most health clubs have facilities to accommodate children. It's fun, it's healthy, and you'll be absolutely amazed at how many new people you meet if you put in a little effort. You might think that this advice sounds lame and very ordinary, but let me assure you, this works wonders. If you stay busy, then you reduce the time you spend being depressed about things you have no control over. It might seem impossible to get through this now, but the human spirit is strong. All of us reading this have faith in you and your ability to take this head on and come out the other side a better and stronger person. We did it, SO CAN YOU !!!

 

Gerhard.

[sean91607306444]

ive never been able to go from loving somebody to just deciding one day that i dont anymore and go jump into another relationship with someone els.its happening to me right now with the woman i love.she still loves me but shes doing everything she can to forget me but she wont totally let go...it sucks !!!!!

[karam]

hey there,

yea i agree with the first reply, you need to move on he has done it so you need to move on with your life, the fact that you still feel so strongly after 2 years is a wonder,there must be somethign that reminds you of him, maybe your son.. but then you must hink that you need to teach your son not to be like his father, to treat women well and not just leave for the sake of it and if he ever fathers a child then stay true to the commitment to that child to be his dad! you are a strong women to keep going, the worst thing is to see anex with someone new..but with a new wife..that must be painful..we feel for you... but at the same time you must realize that he is gone and you cant do anything about it.. its like wanting to be a bird..its not going to happen!! you can dress up and jump off as many cliffs as possible but all your goign to do IS HURT YOURSELF!! so be true to yourselfand move on with your life, pick up your heart, make it whole again,and then when your ready, which you will be one day, pass it on again to someone that will treat it with care and love, as if it were there own.

Karam

if yougot any advice for me look up my situation undder my user name.

[BoDyFrOsT]

Hey girl, I know exactly how you feel. My boyfriend kinda left me too and I really want him back. I personally dont know what to do without him. I'm always thinking about him. And sometimes I cry thinking about everything we used to do. It just hurt because we wont be that close anymore. And I wonder if I did anything wrong. Maybe he just doesnt understand me and expects me to understand him. I find it very hard to get over him because I care for him so much and I still do. My friends tell me to forget him and that I could do better. But thats not how it works. Our feelings cant be changed so fast from what other people say. And another thing, people might not understand how we feeling until they go through the same stage. I just wanted to tell you that I have a similar problem. And sometimes I wonder if I just got ugly one day. I really miss him. Try talking to your friends and have them listen to you. I know they wont ignore you. Or keep writing here and hope for more advices or comments. I wish the best for you. Bye.