how can i get him back?

[steviesangel]

ok im going to try and tell the full story because i need lots of peoples advice.

Last year i started going out with a man who i have kind of known since i was 12, he is a year older than me, and although we never actually spoke to one another, we remembered each other, we both had said we always looked at each other etc but nothing ever happened. A mutual friend finally got things started between us and the 1st night we went out, he explained to me that he was still married and had 2 children but been separated for approx 2 years which i already knew.

He said she was a very selfish person but didnt go into alot of detail.

we dated for about a month and got along amazingly, so much in common, was like we were 1 person. Then he didnt turn up 1 nite and the next day he said he stayed at his wifes and they spoke all nite and that they were giving it another go. I didnt understand why as over the month he told me more about her, about how she threw him through a shop window, how she constantly hit him infront of the kids, and alot more.

Now this hurt me, but i hoped that at somepoint we could become friends as we got along so well.

2 days after we split a friend of his and his wife turned up at my door asking if he was here and told him we were no longer together etc, i invited him in , in the hopes i could sly some info from him. Instead he tried to bed me then when i turned him down he said that steve hated me that i would never see him again and many other things.

4 weeks later a friend of mine told steve everything his friend had said and done and we got talking, the next day he came round to lend me a few cd's that i had been after, a friendship began that nite. Over a few days, we got very drunk one night ended up in bed etc etc

I tried to make it look like it was a mistake and we wouldnt do it again, he took offence which i was hoping he would do and we started seeing each other again, this time more serious, i met his children and his family who all fell in love with me. He told me he loved me and wanted to be with me forever and that for the 1st time in his life i had shown him wot happiness was, i felt the same. Over the time we were together i knew she was sending text messages, trying to get him back, she caused alot of trouble saying the kids were not allowed round my house and all sorts. i overheard a phone call to her one nite telling her he didnt want to lose me again and leave him alone. then, he turns up at my house one nite, tells me he wants space, its over etc. i try and ask if its because he is getting back with his wife, he tells me no, just that he not ready for a relationship, a few days ago i find out it wasnt space, he is living their again, and already she has started being violent and he has returned to his parents for nite or two. All i know is that if it wasnt for her we would be fine. I have heard the children are missing me badly. I know they dont like their mum. I want him and the kids back and dont know what to do.

 

[markm]

Souds like the "No Contact" thing is your way to go!

If what you say is accurate.....

I think since he was feeling so good with you, he thought he could do the same with the ex-wife.

However, the ex-wife is already beating him and the kids talk about you and miss you.

Well, how long do you think he's gonna put up with that?

Don't contact him, he'll miss you and think "uh oh what have I done?"

He thinks things were gonna be different with the ex and of course they aren't.

Sounds to me he'll want to come around, but you have to implement the "NO CONTACT" thing.

This could take a while, do hang in there!

[steviesangel]

thank u mark, lets hope he misses the respect and things i do, the kids loved being here because they said my house doesnt smell and u play games with us. Being with him and his kids made me feel like i wasa happy to be me for once.

Thanx again mark

x