is this normal?

[lonelyboy802]

the feeling of wanting to die. is there something wrong with you if you just dont want to live anymore? i cant think of any event or trigger to make me feel this way, i just want to die. why? i don't feel sad, or depressed, or anything.

[waveseer]

When it is unaccompanied by discomfort of any kind and it happens to me it means I am about to undergo a change in internal direction or evolve inside. For me it represents the dying of the old way and then will come the birth of the new way.

[lonelyboy802]

i hope its something like that. cause there's this image i have of myself plunging a knife into my gut, and instead of being afraid or angry or w/e you're supposed to feel, i feel happy. like its something that i want..

[waveseer]

What differentiates the feeling you just described of the aftermath from how you feel right now?

[lonelyboy802]

you speak very eloquently =)

 

i want to die, and i feel happy thinking about it. but i don't feel like acting on the actions.

i really dont know.. if i know myself, this is just me making up things to get attention. "heh stupid (talking to myself)" anyway thanks.

[floating_away]

The feeling is definitely normal in the sense that many people go through the same thing. I often feel like I just don't want to live anymore. I go to sleep hoping that I don't wake up. It's certainly not healthy, but you have to address why you feel that way. Is there some event that caused you to feel like this? Low self esteem? Rejection? It's more productive to talk about the causes, so that you can deal with them and start to feel better.

 

Edit: It's definitely a bad thing that you feel happy imagining killing yourself. If you're not depressed, or sad, think about the thing you'll be missing out on.

[waveseer]

Thanks.

 

Do you think you want to die just to experience it? Or maybe the goriness is appealing?

 

You might try making hamburgers (because you get to stick your fingers into the ground meat).

 

Or for the other possibility reading about people who've "died" and come back, that's always interesting.

 

It's totally okay to want attention, we all need it.

[lonelyboy802]

some reasons why might be, i do have low self esteem, i have a boring life, i dont feel alive i just kinda get by day by day.

 

thats an interesting thought "die just to experience it" but that doesnt describe the way i feel. i hate gore >.

 

punching ground meat is fun though nice stress reliever

 

and people who've died and come back. yeah no. i think they're just lucky. they probably dont even remember being dead until they've been told.

[waveseer]

What could you do to feel more alive?

[lonelyboy802]

i'd hang out with friends if i had any. hm.. i cant really think of anything that would make me feel alive. ideas?

[waveseer]

I am a firm believer in getting outside and doing physical activity. Biking, hiking, skateboarding, skydiving, rock climbing, running, swimming, etc. Do any of these or any other sports appeal to you?

[lonelyboy802]

i guess this is when i mention i have just about zero interests. skydiving sounds really neat, but i dont trust myself falling out of a plane and plummeting to the ground and going "oops, i forgot to pull the pin" then splat i go.

 

!! just thinking about that gave me a little chuckle. what is wrong with me >.

[waveseer]

Brand new skydivers usually jump with an instructor or are on a static line. There's no way to mess up, at least not the first time. Parasailing is another variation where you glide to the ground.