When did I start thinking like a loser?

[Gon]

Hello, people.

 

I am having some issues as you've might already have guessed.

I will try to make my story short.

 

I was together with a wonderful girl for about 11 months, then she broke up saying that she needed time alone. I agreed and I stayed out of her face. One might say that I adopted the No Contact technique. So after about three months she sent a mail saying that she had been thinking about me a lot lately, we got together and began hanging out. One thing led to another and we got back together again. Everything was fine and dandy till I noticed a note hanging on one of her walls..

 

.. The note read something like, "Hello there, Sweety. Why are you sitting here all alone? And most importantly, why are you wearing clothes?". I asked about the note and she said that a bloke she knew had written it and that they had used to give such notes to eachother for fun. I didn't pay much attention to it. (I have been a bit jealous in the past, but this was in the beginning of our new-found relationship. I just shrugged it off). Note that this I suspect this to be the same guy she had gone to a prom with under our breakup. Anyways, back to the subject:

Today I was alone in her apartment and I flipped the note because in the sun I could see something written on the other side of it.

"I am just sitting here waiting and hoping to meet you (Always hoping). And I am wearing these clothes so that you can tear them off with your teeth later on *blush*".

 

The thing is that she went to a party at the same place as this guy would be. Aparantly he had put her on his lap and begun making out with her (in a fun way as she put it. Not "really" making up). And he had also thrown her on to his bed that same night.. She didn't tell me anything else because I said that it bothered me.

(Mind you, this is one of the reasons we broke up earlier. I felt her drifting away and felt jealous when she spent more time with her friends than she did with me, and so it was noticeable that she did not like me bringing this up)

Anyways, she said that she had not been in a relationship with him whilst we were broken up and that was good enough for me. Now this note has made me really confused.

 

Why is she even leaving it up when she knows I dislike these things? I've controlled my emotions all day and put up a decent face, yet I don't want to confront her more about this issue since it was something similar that ruined it for us in the past.

Dear people of eNotalone, what should I do? Am I even over-reacting?

[Michael2]

No you arent over reacting. In my opinion she is disrespecting no only your relationship, but most importantly you.

 

Put her in your shoes.

 

Time for a talk. Tell her it bothers you. I know it would bother me.

[pra_fool]

Well I think, you are not over-reacting, infact your are doing pretty well and correct. Its difficult to control your emotions and not to bring up the subject for a open talk, but I would say don't hurry, for time being you can wait and watch what she do and say to you. Soon you will know more and exact what she wishes, whether to have relation with you or not. If she wish to be with you, she will be more careful not to do anything that may hurt you. So that will be good and you can leave off the past and proceed further with your relatoinship. But if she don't changes her ways and keeps doing such things regardless of how it affects you, I feel, its not worth to suffer all the pain and hurt for her then. See, if she wants to be with you, she will come to you, because you are there available to her, but if she doesn't want that, she may just play games and it will not be difficult for you to know that, so just wait and watch a little more....and soon you will yourself know what you have to do then....

Thats all I can tell you.....Best of Luck...

[Gon]

Thanks a lot, you guys.

I'm thinking I should just tear it down and throw it without saying anything and if she asks, I'll explain why.

 

I really appreciate your input.

You've helped me a lot, believe it or not