Loss and Gain

[ResonanceTheory]

I have lost. I have lost and gained more than anyone could know.

I lost my father. I lost my father to alcohol and another family and distance and age and misunderstanding.

I gained my mother. I gained unconditional love, and wisdom, and tolerance.

I lost my childhood. I lost ignorance and peace and belief that fairytale endings were a right and not a privilege.

I gained adulthood. I gained growth and responsibility and the realization that the world turns in ways that suit purposes grander than my own.

I lost God. I lost the faith, the security, the eternal, mitigating hand of ultimate justice and reward, and belief that someday it would be rendered unto me.

I gained humanity. I gained belief in my role as a member of the human race and the need for conviction and action and the enduring nature of the human spirit.

I lost loves. I lost joy and passion and a state of suspended bliss in which I believed that nothing, nothing could touch me.

I gained myself. I gained resolve, and faith in who I am, as a human being; I looked into the darkest depths of depression, stood bare in the face of my troubles and found a heart still beating, still alive.