So I think I like my best friend.

[Sakamya]

Lately I've been having these really weird feelings about my absolute best friend. The only problem is, I'm a girl and so is she. Admittedly, we're not exactly typical girls, being as both of us are pretty tomboy-ish and all our other best friends are guys, but still. She's been absolutely the turning point in me finding out about myself. I was really confused about two years ago about who I really wanted to be, and then that very same year I met her. We grew progressively closer, and now we're so close that we talk on the phone everyday and see each other almost as often. We openly admit that we love each other as friends. So what's happening here when I think I feel more than I should?

She's the dominant one of the two of us, meaning that she's stronger and quite a bit more masculine. She's the type that one would think might be a lesbian just because of the way she dresses and acts. She's pretty...well, you know. Stereotypical lesbian here. Not saying that that's a bad thing, obviously that's sort of the point of this thread. She often puts her arm around me and calls me names like "baby" or "sweetie." We play around a lot and use pick up lines on each other.

I love being close to her and feeling her arm around me. She's a lot of the reason that I get up in the morning, and I'm wondering if that's weird. Is is okay to feel this way about a best friend? And is it really liking her, or am I just enjoying having a friend that's as close to me as she is?

And if it maybe is that I like her, what should I do about it? I don't want to lose her friendship. I'm just terribly confused.

[pivotal]

There is obviously attraction beyond friendship on your part.

 

Due to some external influence you can't be honest with yourself, or feel guilty about being attracted to someone of the opposite sex.

 

Get rid of the indecisiveness on your part and be open with her about your feelings.

[Sakamya]

I'd like to just tell her, but I'm afraid of what she'll think. Last night on the phone I discreetly convinced her to tell me if she was bi, because I know she likes guys and wanted to see if she liked girls, too. I got a joking answer because she said she was asexual. And that makes me feel worse.

[iwalas]

asking her outright seems dangerous. if she's as important to you as you make her sound, you might run the risk of scaring her off with your honesty. if you decide you HAVE to know, then i guess you have to know. but for now, i'd try to let it cool off for a few days. if she wonders the same about you and you start acting "differently" then she might bring it up first too, so again, you're walking on dangerous ground. relax, give it time, see if she shows any signs it might be more than friendship too.

 

i've got a few friends that are gay, and one told me the first time he tried talking to another boy about his crush was the hardest thing he'd ever done to that point in his life. good luck!

[Sakamya]

Oh, well, that makes it better. The hardest thing in his life?! I guess I identify. She really is super important and I'm sure that if I lost her I'd be the lost one. The problem is that I already sort of get the signs that she might like me as more than a friend. She's never been like this with any other person like she is with me. I talked to her sister. I just can't be SURE. That's the real problem.