someguyinus Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 I'm looking for some advice on whether to continue this relationship. I've been dating a girl for about 2 months...she is 27 and I am 21. She is from Europe(I live in the US) and she is here in the US for another 8 months. We really enjoy being with each other and recently have been talking about the future of our relationship. She was alone for about a year before she met me, because she said that she didn't want to be in a relationship if she would have to eventually leave permanently. This was until she met me, and since she has started falling for me. It wasn't until I was out of town for about 10 days that she started realizing what it would be like to have to leave me forever in 8 months. She told me that this really scares her and she doesn't know what to think of it. I asked her if she was here for another 2 or 3 years, what she would want to do, and she said "i would want to be with you". So the issue is whether it makes sense for either of us to continue a relationship and possibly incur the hurt of losing each other (maybe forever) after 8 months. I feel that as strongly as we feel about each other now, that it makes sense to accept the fact that in the worst case, it would be over forever in 8 months, and to continue seeing each other now and become more intimate. I know how much it will hurt but to me I don't like to regret things and I honestly don't know what could possibly happen 8 months down the road, so I wouldn't want to end it now because of the uncertainty of our future lives. What do you guys think? Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 well, it would be hard to end it in 8 months, but it also would be hard to end it now esp with knowing that the other person is still around and single! I think if you think you are not attached to her that much right now end it, if not stay with her till she goes. why does she have to go btw? Link to comment
someguyinus Posted December 23, 2008 Author Share Posted December 23, 2008 well, it would be hard to end it in 8 months, but it also would be hard to end it now esp with knowing that the other person is still around and single! I think if you think you are not attached to her that much right now end it, if not stay with her till she goes. why does she have to go btw? she is basically here on a work visa...and when it ends she has to go. its definitely a tricky situation and she told me she basically fell for me against all the odds... Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 she is basically here on a work visa...and when it ends she has to go. its definitely a tricky situation and she told me she basically fell for me against all the odds... can't she extend her work visa? how much are you attached to her now? Link to comment
someguyinus Posted December 23, 2008 Author Share Posted December 23, 2008 can't she extend her work visa? how much are you attached to her now? no she already extended it and can't again. i want to be with her -- but at the same time i don't want her to be too hurt if it has to end. obviously i would prefer to continue the relationship Link to comment
redhearts Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 Then continue it and have your break up set in stone, lovely. Its like planning your fate. Your feelings will be stronger and by then you'll go crazy. Saying you'll go visit her, call her *not knowing how much it'll cost*, the time difference. LDR are hard, over the pond even harder. Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 no she already extended it and can't again. i want to be with her -- but at the same time i don't want her to be too hurt if it has to end. obviously i would prefer to continue the relationship where is she from? if you become serious, you WILL find a way to stay together! Link to comment
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