Do I have a right to be upset?

[NATALIE]

This is the situaton, my boyfriends mother recently passed away after being sick for while. His ex-girlfriend sent him a card reading that she is here for him if he needs anything at all. She left her new cell phone number and wrote I will always love you. I am a little upset because she knows he has a girlfriend (me) and why would he need her. I mean I understand sending a card but I feel she did not have to write so much in it. I dont know am I wrong in feeling this way, if so let me know. Another thing is he doesnt know that I seen the card.

[poonany]

Its ok to be annoyed, but if he doesnt show the same interest in HER, then why be jealous? As long as he doesnt feel, or say the same things about her, then your ok. You should be proud girls still and do care for him, but hes YOUR man, not theres.

 

Jealousy is a hard thing, me and lots of others have a big problem with it. Just remember she is his ex for a reason, and ehs with you for a reason. He cares for you romaticly and NOT her.

 

good luck

[elite867]

First of all, your feelings cannot be "wrong." You are feeling them, you can't help that. Never let anyone tell you that you are wrong to feel a certain way. You don't have all the facts and knowing another detail or aspect may change the way you feel about it. However, with what you know, you can't help to feel any other feeling than what you feel.

 

It may have been out of line for her to send that card. My husband has a friend that is a girl and they are very close, personally. Distance wise, she is accross the country. I feel very jealous when they talk on the phone (sometimes for hours). However, he had been friends with her for about 5 years before we met.

 

I talked to my husband abot how it made me feel. He thought I was silly for feeling that way, but that is because he knew he would never do anything with her. I have talked to him and to her about it and now I am okay with it because I trust them both completely.

 

I would talk to them, or at least to your boyfriend. Tell him you read it and how it made you feel. Try not to be hostile but honest, you may feel differently about it.

[avman]

Well if they've managed to salvage a friendship out of their breakup I don't think that what she did was out of line. After all, this is a pretty serious blow to him and so she obviously wanted to lend her support and comfort.

 

Unless there is more to this story than meets the eye I guess I wouldn't be overly worried about it. He needs all the love, comfort, and support he can get right now.

 

avman