something wrong with me?

[guber88]

okay, this is my problem... I like to make girls fall for me, I dont mean to do this listen though i get them to like me cause i convince myself that i like them and as soon as they say they like me and want me and blah blah blah i dont want them any more... Its like i just like them for them to like me and when they do its time to move on to the next person.. I think it has something to do with the first girl i loved who did it to me.. i mean i loved her and she messed with my head.. Can anyone relate?

[in_the_mirror]

well i can't relate but maybe you should just let someone fall for you without "your help" i guess you could say. and see how that goes. cuz when you flirt or make someone like you sometimes you don't tend to be yourself so if you just chill and act like yourself so that someone will start to like you instead of the other way around (kinda) you will find a girl that likes you and that should make you be more into her. i hope this helps

 

DMBF

[dikaia880]

I completely relate to this problem. Its a great feeling to have someone fall for you, but when you realize you don't like them you feel pretty bad about it. I think it's not that your doing it because of your ex, just that when you think someone is what you want and you go for it, and sometimes it turns out that it's not what you want. It's a hard thing, i've hurt a couple girls by thinking they were what i wanted. I think that you should just be yourself, and when you meet someone really think about how you feel about them and not rush into it. If you relax and take it all a little slower it will be a lot easier to figure out how you feel, and will save everybody the heartache that comes out of things like that sometimes.

[routerx]

Yes. I did this all during my teens and my 20's.

 

You probably lack love in your life. You don't feel special. I'm talking about family love, not sexual or opposite sex love. You are using others to obtain that friendly non-threatening love. Because you have not received enough safe love in your life you don't fully love yourself.

 

You need to learn how to love yourself and you will no longer use other people to feel special.

 

I would opening your heart to volunteer opportunities and sports teams. These will get you closer to heartfelt appreciate for who you are. Also, it sounds corny, but tell yourself you love yourself.

 

Put it this way, I did it for 20 years. I'm 35 and single and just now in solid relationships. I suggest you don't go this path. I wish I would have loved myself in my 20's, but I didn't and thus, I let no one love me.

[Sashenka]

I did exactly the same thing when I was like 14-18..

 

But I am 20 soon and practiclly grown away from the behaiour.

 

Though I didn't want to date a guy and when he fell in love with me and saw hom for what he was, it's stopped and I could finally be together with Nick as I really feel for him after he fell for me.

[ilinara]

I know this. Maybe you should raise the level and should try to get someone attracted that you even might think she would not be interested. That way it will not be so easy to give up, you will be flattered that she likes you.