what should I do?

[erics_gal]

I am dating somebody, and there is this other guy that I have develpoed feelings for, and now i don't know what to do?!? the other guy is a real nice sweet and well just a good guy. I have been dating my guy for almost two years, and we are even talking about getting married. this other guy is fun and exciting, and he really likes me too. what should i do? help

[fightthisfeeling]

allright well is the guy ur with some 1 u could see urself hapily spending the rest of your lfe with. same for the other guy. I think that you should tell your boyfrined of 2 years how u feel about the other guy and itll help you. but Dont make a mistake and choose wrong.

[Frodo Baggins]

I need to ask how long you've known this new person? Try not to become too infatuated with someone "fast and exciting," they may have caught your eye now, but you need to step back and see if this is someone you can see yourself in a relationship with. In stepping back, you also need to look at yourself and see if you're really ready to get married and if it's to the guy you're with. You need to take inventory of your life in this stage and start gathering informations before making important decisions.

[neallo82288]

I found it strange that you did not mention your feelings for your boyfriend. Yes, that is strange because if you had true feelings for him (especially someone you are planning to marry) then you would have felt no problem in mentioning it. You need to find out your true feelings for your present boyfriend and that will help you understand your feelings for this new guy. You, also failed to mention your age, which matters only if you are under twenty-five. Youth is wasted on the young. Feelings for the new guy is natural (even if you trully do love you b/f). You may need to break it off with your present b/f, because you must find your true feelings for him. Thsi may be difficult with him constantly around you. Just be truthful to your boyfriend and hopefully everything will work out for you.

 

Neallo

[Michael2]

Uh oh, an instance where someone believes the grass may be greener on the other side.

 

I believe you may be under the age of twenty. I might be wrong though.

 

You really have to sit down with your boyfriend and discuss your feelings. It will be a great relief for yoiu, but be aware this may hurt your boyfriend and raise all sorts of flags.

[Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb]

Hey

 

Yea during a long-term relationship, we often have thoughts about cheating as we usually loose that rush adrenaline felt during earlier stages of relationships and often wonder what it might be like with someone else.

 

I'm against on cheating due to many reasons:

 

Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD's):

As with all sexual relationships, STD's are a serious threat to both you and your significant other. We all know about the effects of HIV and AIDS, but there are ranges of other STD's that will alter your lifestyle in a heartbeat. Chlamydia, syphilis, genital warts, gonorrhea and herpes are just a few diseases that will not only ruin your existing relationship, but will become a major obstacle with many future relationships. So before you go off with your booty call, since it is next to impossible to tell if they are carrying anything, wrap it up. For more information on STD's, check out our STDs section. If you don't care about yourself, at least have the compassion for the person you are putting at risk.

 

Loss of Trust:

You may think that this is irrelevant to you because he/she "isn’t going to catch you". Okay, you can think like that, but what if the impossible happens. Getting caught by your significant other will lead to dozens of problems, both short and long-term. First of all, he/she can very well leave your butt on the spot. Relationships are built on trust and breaking that bond is often irreversible.

 

But if he/she really loves you and decides to maintain the relationship, then you have some interesting problems for the road ahead. How does getting questioned about everything you do sound? Or even better, knowing that your significant other could hold your screw up above your head for the remainder of your relationship? Let us give you a quick answer here; it will suck.

 

Loss of Respect:

This ties in with the loss of trust in a relationship because if you cannot keep your pants on when you are with someone, you are a sorry piece of work. Most people with healthy relationships believe not only in respecting their spouse, but also believing and respecting one's self. Without this key element, he/she will be questioning if it is really worth their time to continue staying with you. Furthermore, you integrity as a quality person will be jeopardized. If you get dumped, who are you going to try for next? Oh her/him? Sorry, he/she heard about your exploits and is not going to touch you with a ten-foot pole. Believe me when i say, "word gets around".

 

Happy Heb

[Michael2]

Hmm, happy hit that right on. You mess up once, bye bye relationship, believe us.

 

Once they stray , stay far far away.

 

I suppose you have read a few posts in these forums, do you want your boyfriend to end up like one of us. Look how much pain cheating and breakup's cause. End the relationship or start rethinking your priorities in life.

 

By the way Happy, I studied abroad in Brisbane a few years ago. What a beautiful country you are from.

[humanoidcontent]

I'd like to make the one point here that you HAVE been going out with this guy for 2 years, and it will crush him so badly if you leave him- especially outta the blue for some "guy". He won't be the same.

 

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[erics_gal]

You know I thought about it all night last night and here's what I came up with. I've been with eric 2 years, and I am 21 years old. I think it's time i got seriuos, and not even mess with this other guy. I couldn't stand the thought of me hurting Eric like that, and I don't want to hurt myself. Just because this other guy is exciting and new, I can't just give up a strong relationship for some fun. Whatever i have dreamed up I'm sure I can go to Eric and talk about it. If he loves me, then he should respect that I am coming to him for help. thank you all. I was about to make a huge mistake.

[humanoidcontent]

I'm glad to see you make the right choice- good luck on your relationship~!

 

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