this confuses me

[swift2k4]

theres this girl i like. me and her talk alot but me and her fight alot also. i dont know why i like her if all we seem to do is fight. last saturday we started talking again and until tuesday we didnt get into a single fight. i got mad because i found out she dont like me and because she told me come on id never like you. that really hurt. so i got mad but i got over it i called her after basketball practice yesterday but we seem to not get along alot and i can only sometimes be nice. she keeps telling me i like it when your nice not when your mean. i think she has no idea that i like her. but i want to get her to notice me or to atleast somehow make us not fight as much. please any advice would be great

[Sheyda]

[This post has been deleted]

[Heretic]

Heya Swift2k4! This little problem isn't going to get any easier, over time like some others.

 

A relationship with someone you tend to argue with can be very troublesome. It seems to me that you both enjoy each others company but know how to push each others buttons too well.

 

The thing you have to figure out is why you're always fighting? What's really bothering you? Are you jealous that she's not going out with you? Is it something else in your life that's bothering you? Or is she always starting the fights? In the latter case you need to ask her if somethings bugging her, get her to open up a bit.

 

If you tell her that you really enjoy spending time with her and wish you could somehow get along better, it might help her realize how much you care. It could get her to notice you in a different way. Also if you actively try to stop the fights but not raising your voice or even saying "I never thought of it that way..." could seriously improve your chances. I'm not asking you to give up, I'm asking you to try to see things her way then explain yours. It will help her see the validity in your argument.

 

I hope this helps! Best of luck and get ready for some hard work.