desperately need help

[confused_me]

hi!!i am new to this forum and am sorry this is goin to be a long one.my story goes like this.i live in a different country as am doin my graduate studies.i had gone home this summer and there i met this beautiful women thro a frnd.we connected right away and i really had an amazing time wth her.i fell in love wth her.i realised she also liked me.so i juss told her my feelings.she had a horrendous past.she was ina 4 yr relationship which she boke off 'cause the guy was abusive and she fell out of love.but she is still frnds wth the guy as he was her best frnd b4 they were in a relationship.but i spoke to her and somehow she felt that she can work this out and she agreed to it.we spent some quality time together for2 mnths and the i had to leave the country to get back to my studies.2 mnths was over everythin was fine and one fine day she juss told me that can't be in the relationship anymore.i was really heart broken.i tried talkin to her but she stuck to her decision.we still speak to each other everyday and she says she still loves me but she ds nt want to get married to anyone.and she is very sure of it.she says she wanted so much to get married to her ex-bf but he broke her heart and after tht she ds nt want to get married to anyone.i know she is nt having any feelings for her ex anymore for sure.i also know that she loves me.i am so confused.i juss don't want to let her go.now the best part is,she is comin to the same country where i live for higher studies and sahe woudl juss be an hr drive from the place where i live.i spoke to her yesterday and she told me she also loves me bu she ds nt want to get married to me and she ds nt see any future.so she ds nt want to hurt me later on.she ds nt want to hurt my parents later on.what do i do?how do i assure her wth my words??please someone help.i will be meeting her in 10 days time...both of us r 24...

[secret_agent_man]

Hello confused,

Your name isn't that strange around here, a LOT of people are confused about what to do with their situations.

 

I understand that you are torn with what to do about this girl, and I know where you are coming from. I don't have any answers, and nobody can tell you what the "right way to handle it" is.

 

All I can tell you is that she is strong, she knows what is right for her. She knows that getting married is not right for her at the moment, and if that's what she feels, then you should respect it. Just give her space, and if she comes around and realizes that you are what she needs, then she will figure it out. There are many things in life that we can't decide for someone else, and this is one of them.

 

I encourage you to live your own life, and let her figure out herself. If she figures out that you are what she needs, then she will decide that on her own.

 

Have faith, things will happen as they should. Be yourself; nobody can ask more than that.

 

S.A.M.