Should I Do This?

[LW4E]

About a month ago my girlfriend of nearly three years broke up with me.

 

I was crushed about it for a week or two until I finally decided to start improving myself, I have been walking to and from school every day instead of taking the bus, eating healthier and basically just getting out more.

 

My ex and I have a friend who's boyfriend broke up with her back in February. We used to walk this girl to the bus stop in the morning because her mom is crazy and doesn't want her walking alone lol.

 

Ever since my girlfriend broke up with me she has just about ceased her connections with her real friends, so this girl doesn't even bother to call my ex in the morning anymore. Instead, she calls me to walk her to the bus stop.

 

For the last two weeks I've been walking her to the bus stop and we've been talking to each other about wanting our exes back. Sometimes we have really long and really open conversations about our relationships and our exes.

 

We're both really shy around members of the opposite sex so I always found it nice that the two of us could talk so openly with each other.

 

She recently told me that even though she wants her ex back, she wants to play the feild a little bit to see who else is out there because at the moment her ex doesn't seem fully interested in having her back.

 

Well...

 

I too want my ex back and want to "play the feild" a bit, just to see if trying to get her back would be a good choice.

 

Since we're both open to giving new people a chance, i've been thinking of asking her if she'd be interested in spending a bit more time with me, not a date or anything but just spend more time talking and getting to know each other.

 

I know this is a good way to improve my confidence with the opposite sex, I just want to know if this is a good idea. I'm not looking to get with her or anything, I just want to get to know her a bit better as she's not one of those friends who I hang out with all the time.

[Roasted Carrots]

I think you have a great basis for a friendship with this girl.

 

HOWEVER. Both of you just got dumped. It might not be wise to rebound off each other.

[stereoeclectic]

the getting in shape thing is a good idea. that's what i've done since the breakup of my long term relationship.

 

as for dating the girl, it really depends. it's worth a try certainly, if you feel like you are ready. just make sure you are doing it for the right reasons.

[LW4E]

I'm not looking to date her, we've been friends for almost a year now but like I said, she's not one of the people I hang out with on a regular basis.

 

I did, at one point feel a little guilty while I was still in a relationship because I sorta felt myself developing a "thing" for her. Since I was in a relationship at the time I continuously reminded myself that I had a girlfriend and going forth and trying to like someone else isn't good, no matter the circumstance. Two months later, my girlfriend dumps me for some old English pervert, but that's another story.

 

So yeah, I have at one point liked this girl, but i'm not looking to pursue a relationship with her, I've heard of how hazardous the "rebound" relationships can be and right now I don't even know if I want to be involved in a relationship... i'd just like to get to know her better because we've been through similar experiences. Her boyfriend dumped her just days shy of their one year anniversary, my girlfriend dumped me less than two months from our three year anniversary.

 

So yeah, I do realize what it could lead to. In terms of my ex, when I first met her I said the same thing, that I just wanted to get to know her better and I ended up falling in love with her. I'm still in love with her and after what she did to me, I think it'll be pretty damn hard for me to fall in love again.

[stereoeclectic]

i definitely understand that.

 

well, you guys are at a similar place in your lives, so be there for each other and keep an eye open to see if anything is developing.