Why guys say "want to be friends" when everything

[JaimeNLuv]

Why do guys say that want to be friends after everything is going sooo good? I am so confused. I was dating this man and we get along great... never a problem, common interests and all of a sudden he says I am a great woman, with many many great qualities and I deserve someone who will give me all of their attention and appreciation but unfortunately he is not that man. Why do they do that? I swear I found my soulmate. what can I do to win him?

[charmed]

Hi JamieNLuv,

 

Why do guys say that they want to be friends?

 

For the same reason that women say it ! We say that to attempt to show how the situation can still be ok even though the nature of the relationship has or is about to change. Whether this works in practice, or whether it is being said with no thought behind it varies from case to case.

 

He seems to be lacking the will and energy to make your relationship work. There may be another reason, but I would take what he has said at face value unless you have reason to believe otherwise.

 

To win him? Well, that could be hard. It depends how sure he is that you don't belong together, and how determined he is to not get back together. You will have to talk to him, and you will need him in a postion to talk.

 

If he is not in that position, you should move on - that is, if he is not really interested in talking about the relationship.

 

If he will talk, then you need to find out what he would like to see you do to help the relationship succeed.

 

Hope this helps you some,

[Beec]

He could be playing you or losing interest. Developing a relationship is a bit of a cat and mouse game sometimes. The cat who just pounces and misses, scares the cat into a hole from which the mouse is not going to come out of, until the cat goes away. Both men and women play each other, making say two steps forward then one step back. If you jsut keep coming and coming, you seem desparate, which sets of warning alarms in the other persons head. In addition to taking steps forward and backward, you should be inviting him to take steps forward when you draw back. Then when both of yuo have come forward together, uch him away. Then repeat the whole process. Sooner or later, you end up in a relationship. Humans are weird aren't they??