Losing My Friends,,,,Getting Depressed :(

[bryan]

I have been hanging out with my friends daily since my ex broke up with me. My ex was my best friend and I kind of neglected my other friends when her and I were together. But about a month ago, my ex came back and wanted to be friends with me, even though she had a boyfriend. This was great and all, but I realized it just got me more attached to her again and I wanted her back. So I basically cut contact with her so now she is no longer there.

 

Then one of my other good female friends (with whom I have been friends for 4 years) had sex with my older brother at my Lake Tahoe cabin during my birthday party with all my friends. I told her that was very disrespectful to me since we have been close friends for so long. She is one of the few female friends that I have with whom I havn't slept. Her and I always tell each other we will get married one day. Well I dont marry people who sleep with my family members, its just not right. So I have pretty much pushed her out of my life. I did so much for her too: fix her car, buy her lunch/dinner all the time, invite her with me to parties when she was sitting at home alone, and basically was the type of guy she could call at 3am in the morning for a ride if she was too drunk (and she knew I wouldnt take advantage of her like many of her guy friends.) I feel so used by her. Plus this girl has a lot of female friends who were also my friends, so now that she is out of my life, so are those other girls (they stick together).

 

And I recently got a job as a local police officer recruit, which means I can't hang around my guy friends because many of them are into drugs and breaking the law. This would be the worst role model for me to enforce the law, then come home and hang out with the guys and watch them break the same laws that I had just arrested someone for . So basically I only have a handful of friends who are good friends and are good roll models but they are either married or too caught up into their jobs. I know I wont be thinking about it as much when I go to the academy, but for the next 2 months I know I will be lonely. I have been trying to work out and study but I feel like I am on house arrest because my friends are basically gone!

 

Sorry this is so long, and I dont really expect any answers, it just felt good to let this off my chest. Thanks!

 

Bryan

[dfcannon]

Sounds like you're making very courageous and wise choices in your life. Soon you'll have all kinds of police officer colleagues to hang out with, and your friends and loved ones will be the kind who respect you and the law. That all will come in time as you live your life in a way that's true to yourself.