My new husband is addicted to internet porn... I think

[Tania]

Since the day we got married (1 year ago) our sex life has dwindled to maybe once a month. I have been rejected 100% of the time I try and initiate sex...in all the usual ways girls no how to do. I recently discoverede my h usband spends hours on-line at porn sites whenever I am out of town ( I travel frequently with my job.) Help. Mysellf esteem is teetering on the edge of a cliff. He won't talk to me about any of this, except for saying this is all my problem.

[jifeak]

Since the day we got married (1 year ago) our sex life has dwindled to maybe once a month. I have been rejected 100% of the time I try and initiate sex...in all the usual ways girls no how to do. I recently discoverede my h usband spends hours on-line at porn sites whenever I am out of town ( I travel frequently with my job.) Help. Mysellf esteem is teetering on the edge of a cliff. He won't talk to me about any of this, except for saying this is all my problem.

 

You need to talk with your husband and find out what is wrong and probably seek counselling. The fact that he looks at porn and manages to make love to you on occasion shows he does have a sexual drive but sex does not represent an emotional connection with him which should be a normal thing. In some individuals sex and love are so separated that they can wholeheartedly love someone and yet have sex with just about anyone that comes their way or even not at all. I can't say anything more as I'm not qualified to. I'm only expressing my thoughts. Please see a therapist and stop blaming yourself.

[wonderer]

Hi Tania.

 

Sorry to hear that your struggling w/ this. I'm hear to tell you that you are not alone. The reason he doesn't want to have sex w/ you is because he is masturbating while looking at his porn. He is being extremely selfish. You need to go on-line at learn everything you can about masturbation addiction and porn addiction and then if he will you need to seek counseling.

 

Please understand that this has nothing to do with how he feels about you! They think that there is nothing wrong with what they are doing and thereforeeee it becomes our problem. I KNOW how difficult it is to not let this affect your self esteem, however you are the same person he married a year ago......this is NOT your fault.

 

I've read all I can read on this topic because I have the same issues at home. I have some questions for you and some insight that might help.....these are things that have helped in my situation. If you would like to talk more, please pm me.

[Tania]

Thank you so much for the replies. I am not working today and can't get rid of my sick feeling in my stomach. I really don't want my husband to come homw from work today because I don't know how to deal with this and I don't want us pushed further apart.