getting back together and wanting it to last

[X ShadowDreamz X]

My ex and I have started to like each other again. Lately he has been hanging around my EX best friend because she now likes him, and is still with his gf. He and I walked home from school together 1 day and a whole lot of stuff happened between us. We talked about how we felt about what was going on with our personal lives, and we apologized to each other for the stuff we did during our break up. We sort of got back together, but it's in secret because he has to set things straight with my ex best friend and needs to break up with his current gf. The 1 thing that keeps bothering me though is that whenever he is around my ex best friend, he acts like he hates me. I want to make sure that when we officially get back together our relationship can be solid and not prone to other people's opinions about the both of us. I really want or relationship to last a long time because I really care about him. How can I make sure that he and I can get a strong relationship this time around? What are some things I should do?

[Mar]

For starters, I think it's good that you and your ex talked about the things that affected your relationship in the first place. But the question I'd have is: have you both changed in that time apart and thought about the mistakes made so they don't happen again? Or is this just a rebound of sorts, because you both miss each other? If he can tell you he still cares about you while he's still with his current g/f, I'd wonder about that. You may be straight in your mind about what you want from/with him, but what about what he wants? Are you sure he can commit to you this time around and not fall back into that old complacency and old attitudes that caused the breakup in the first place?

 

All I'm saying is-be CAREFUL. Don't rush back into this because you miss him. OF COURSE you miss him. That's natural after a breakup. How much does he care about his current girlfriend? Apparently not too much if he can break up with her at the drop of a hat and go back out with you.

 

What I'm trying to say is that I think he has to do a little soul-searching on how committed he's willing to be. I'm just afraid that if you go back out with him too soon, he's going to get angry about some old issue again, and break up with you, or vice versa, start dating someone else.....rebound cycle, in other words. Trust me, I'm psyched to hear that two people that may be right for each other both realize that and want to take another try! Just be CAREFUL! Don't leap with both feet, and explain to him that you're going to be a little more careful and guard your heart for a little while until you're comfortable that this isn't a rebound/"I miss you" situation!

 

Mar