My boyfriend won't quit having cyber sex

[brandywine0429]

I don't know what to do, I am so confused. My boyfriend and I have been together a long time and I love him with all my heart but he is having cyber with other girls online at night when I am sleeping. We have talked about this so many times and he keeps doing it. Should I be making a big deal about this? I feel as though it is cheating but he doesn't. It has gotten so bad that I have checked his emails. I feel like a psycho. I am not the jealous type but this bothers me. What is crazy is that he found out that I was checking them and changed his password but never said a thing about it to me. If he is not hiding anything then why would he care. It has gotten to be this sore subject that we don't talk about. He can't tell me why he likes it. I feel that being intimate with someone is sacred and I don't want to share him with anyone else.

 

Please help, I am so confused about this whole situation. Am I over reacting?

 

B

[DREAM]

Ok im guessing even I would react like you if my guy was doing the same thing. But the only advice I can give you is. Why don't you make it all real for him, but not with the gal on line but with you.

 

Grab his attention to your ends, and if you have to give him a time of his life, this should show him that its not on line sex that is needed but his gals sex.

 

Good luck.

[brandywine0429]

That's just it... I have. We have an amazing sex life.

[buffalosoldier]

Ask him why he feels the need to have computer sex with someone he doesnt know that is probably about 60 yrs old...i would!! If there is nothing wrong with your relationship then there is no need for this,unless thats just what gets him going. I can never understand it personally. You could,if you wanted,try the childish approach and hold back on the goods for a while...that will get his attention!! Failing that just ask him about it,tell him you dont like it and it makes you feel bad.

good luck sista

[gaiabee]

Yes, you should be making a big deal about this.... especially since it upsets you so much. This is not going to just go away. Your relationship is turning into one of mistrust, sneakiness, jealousy and sadness.

 

Honestly, I don't know your situation... but if it were me I would give him an ultimatum... if he didn't stop, I'd leave. I wouldn't want to live like that because I'd consider it cheating too. But you need to do what you feel is right for you.

 

Good Luck

[sonic]

maybe he is getting hints and tips to make your sexlife amazing..

 

I cant say anything except old habits die hard.. I have a different kind of escape but I dont think its unhealthy at all.. if its a growing wall between you why not sit down and talk about it..

[Osiris]

Greetings brandywine0429

 

Imho I don`t think you are over reacting. Possibly your boyfriend have some hidden sexual desires, fantasies that he can satisfy only via cyber sex. However there is a question that I have is his passsion for cyber sex stronger that love towards you?

 

We have talked about this so many times and he keeps doing it.

 

Does he spends a lot of time with you during the day time, weekends?

 

Maybe you could ask one of your mates to enter in to cs chat with you boyfriend, then you would have a bit more info. However I don`t feel it`s a best way to do. Better ask him directly and if he will be evasive in his answers then you have to think where is your relationship is going to.

 

I do wish you all the best, and remember when one has to decide what to do don`t act on emotions alone. Calm down think about it and then listen what your heart is telling you.

 

Sincerely yours,

 

Osiris.

 

 

 

[SusieQ]

Brandy I think you have what is referred to as a "player". I know the type very well. I live with one. Are you sure he's not cheating on you. If given' the chance, a player will. If you have argued about it, then he knows how you feel. He is obviously getting some kind of cheap thrill out of it. And he obviously doesn't care what you think. Dump him!@!!!!!

[frenchie]

Dont calm down and listen to what your heart is telling you cos the one thing that is abundantly clear is that his behaviour is making you very unhappy-he knows you have a problem with it and he continues to do it are these the actions of a man that respects your feelings or for that matter you?

the fact that he is waiting until you go to bed is just rude and sheer betrayal his behaviour is destructive dont allow it to continue to be, youre wortha whole lot more

Get Rid!

Good luck