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I don't know what else to do


So_confused
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I've been going out with this girl for quite a while now and we used to spend quite a bit of time together and both were extremely happy.

She's a busy girl and I understand that fully but she used to make time and effort to see me and now I haven't even done anything with her for weeks. Communication just hasn't been happening and I know that we need that. I've never been so hurt by anyone who cares so much about me. If we have plans she breaks them, if she has time to see me she fills it. She says that I was smothering her, so I gave her all the space she needed. So with everything that happened I just couldn't take it anymore and I packed up everything that she's given me and I dropped it off at her house with a letter saying I can't do this anymore, I can't put in so much effort to not see any in return. She called me really choked that I would give back gifts that she gave me and that they must have not meant anything. Thats the farthest from the truth. I gave them back because I couldn't look at them anymore without feeling pain of something that was once so good and I didn't want to be reminded of what I lost. I still love her with all my heart and I think that she still loves me but I can't be hurt anymore. I know now that by returning her things she was hurt and I've tried to make her understand why I did it but she doesn't seem to understand. I don't want to lose her but I've tried everything and nothing seems to be good enough. I'm just a man and I can't seem to make this work. What am I supposed to do?

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So confused,

Hello to you. I am sorry to hear about this situation with your girl. It sounds to me you may have jumped the gun a bit. Did you really sit down and talk to her about how you felt, and what you needed before dropping the stuff off? I know sometimes we feel so hurt..we just pack everything up and say HERE! We usually regret it a day later. I ususally advice agianst giving things back. Just put them in a closet if you dont want to see them.

 

If you do love her, and want this to work? then ask her for a sit down, talk to her...and then ask for the things back. Even if you are not ready to talk, ask for the things back. This will show her you really do want this to work, you were just upset.

 

Sometimes when we get busy, our realtionships suffer. But really the bigger picture is what matters! She wont be busy for ever...just support her! She will respect you for it.

Best of luck!

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