kungfumaster

Hi everyone, I'm back. It is so hard to let someone go that you've loved for so long (2 + years). Somedays, it is okay - you have fun going out with your friends, but then you come back to the reality of your own grief. I've been reading a good book lately about the grief process after a relationship break-up - its like going down a slide, and its completely dark - you slide and slide, and then suddenly, you hit the bottom. Once you hit the bottom, you can see a sliver of light above you, and then you gain some hope and start gathering strength to climb up the stairs to the top of the slide again - I am not sure whether I have hit the bottom of my slide yet - I mean, I know I'll have to hit it, I just don't know when. I guess I should take my time as you guys have all suggested in previous posts. Have a good rest of the day my friends

Hi everyone, Thanks for the for your input SF_mike - and thanks for the offer of assistance/advise- yah - it kinda sucked getting the silent treatment - for a whole week - I just drank myself to sleep - it was the only way I could fall asleep because it was so painful. Yah - come to think of it SF_mike - there were some communication problems - I can't believe I was so in love - I was denying that there ever was a communication problem - everytime we talked on the phone - I would feel like I always would try to get her to talk - she would always be moody, and I don't know - always seemed withdrawn - but other days, she would just love to talk, but that was rare. And then there were times when she got really mad at me and just hang up on me - oh man - I don't know if you guys have ever gotten hung up on - but it feels like terrible - its like the other person doesn't even respect you - or think that your a human being with feelings - and then she'd expect me to phone her back after she hung up on me - oh man - yah you're right SF_mike - there were communication problems. I was willing to work on the problems though - because - I don't know - I really loved her - she was beatiful, smart, and a very strong person, but I guess she didn't want to work on "us" anymore. Oh crap - got to get back to work. Thanks again SF_mike for your input - yah - sometimes hearing that my relationship (although I loved her alot) had many problems - communication being one of them- and if I dig further - I might find more things. So maybe my relationship was destined to be doomed. More later I guess. Have a good rest of the day everyone! Your angels are still with you

Man - you guys all rock!! You have all been quite a help to me - reading what you guys have all gone through - thanks SF mike and and Luv_Suks for sharing. I recently broke up too - its been one month now - we were together for 2 years and 3 months - we broke up over the Christmas holidays - quite depressing. We were great the first 2 years when we lived in the same city - and then I had to move because of a great job oppurtunity which I couldn't pass up - I was really hoping we could do the long distance thing -because I really loved her - and wanted to be with her forever. But, I'm still not sure what happened. I visited her twice, once per month after I left for work in September, and I was really looking forward to spending Christmas holidays with her but we didn't make it - there's so many details, but I'm not sure anyone wants to hear about it. Anyways, its been 2 weeks since our last online conversation - only one email before that in one month - it still hurts - but "no contact" rule is helping somewhat. Before our online conversation 2 weeks ago - I was actually starting to heal- and the online chat seemed to set me back - I was determined to move on before that - basically, her way of breaking up with me was by avoiding me - she'd never return my emails or answer my calls - so i got the message - man did that hurt - it came out of nowhere- well almost nowhere - i had to be the one to email her to say its okay if we break up - i just wished she'd email me at least if she couldn't tell me in person - man it really hurt. i'm still trying to recover slowly - holy i have alot to say. But, I guess its I am moving on slowly - there is so much to tell still, but i think I have said enough for now. I thank God that this forum is here, and you guys are here for someone like me who needs to let off some steam. Have a good night everyone - and may your angel keep you safe.