xcazx

went to the christmas party friday.something bad happened. im so scared please someone talk to me.i dont feel im getting the help i need here...

Should i tell him that i love him?tell him everything?would that be wise or not? i cant leave that place.ill be miserable without him. i havent seen him for four days and it feels like forever to me, perhaps i am obsessed, but i love him and i want to tell him.

I will be perfectly honest, and say, that i have very extreme strong feeling for the older male that i am at work with. I am working as a waitress in a large resteraunt, or sometimes a kitchen porter and he works as the chef. I am 19 and he is 48. It may be a big age gap i know but i really cannot help the way i feel, and it is the most difficult thing to work with someone feeling like this. He has not one clue of my feelings. He has been married, divorced, he has two daughters, the youngest being in her twentys, and although i am not supposed to know, he will be marrying his partner soon. It only struck me how much i had fallen for him when i overheared his conversation with about his wedding news. I walked away into a private place and cried so suddenly, and so much. I went home that evening and drank a whole bottle of wine alone, and cried myself to sleep. We do sometimes flirt quite a bit, only recently since i have become more relaxed with him. Jokingly, at least i think jokingly, he has said "I woundt do that to you, im too madly in love with you" He sometimes touches my waist to tickle and sometimes comments on my figure. I do admitt i enjoy flirting with him. But at the end of the day, i miss him not being with me. I can hardly eat anymore, i always feel sick with so many emotions and tension in my head. My college work suffers, and i am drinking too much. If anyone can give me any advice please do. Thank You. ](*,)