kennyc90
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Everything posted by kennyc90
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Well, I still get those emotional attacks here and there. I realized that exercising helps a lot, I mean A LOT lol. I also try to look at the bright side of things more than the negative side of things. It doesn't mean that I don't think about the negative things at all, sometimes I can't help it.
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Day 16 Holy cow I did so much at work today, physically and mentally. I'm just drained right now and I even went to the gym and did a crazy workout. I'm ready to go to bed.... ZzZz Goodnight fellas
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Day 15 I had an awful day at work today. Too much BS. I decided to go for a long run after I got off work. That run was what I needed. It felt great. I decided that I'm gonna try to sleep early from now on. I'll try to make that into a habit. It's something that I never done before and besides, your body needs a lot of adequate sleep when you push your muscles to it's full potential. Goodnight fellas.
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Day 14 Today, was a very emotional day. I drafted up an email to her. I wrote my feelings about her and how I was always there for her in the toughest times. The only things was, I didn't send that email. I just wanted to write it out. It felt good. If I sent that email, it's back to square one. I was in such an emotional state of mind that I couldn't help but to write how much I miss her and love her. I went to the gym right after. I felt great afterwards and now I'm preparing to go to bed. I hope I don't get anymore close calls like that. Work tomorrow!!! Arrgghh lol work sucks.. -.-'
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Day 13 I'm still at work and I'll be getting off this morning.
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Day 12 I have work tomorrow. Darn it. Work sucks on the weekends. Anyways, my day started off ok. I thought about her a lot today. I decided to go out for a run. It was the worse run I have ever experienced. I thought I was gonna throw up. For some reason, I felt fatigued. I managed to make it through. I think my ex saw me running, but I'm not sure. I didn't get paid today. Oh well.. I guess I'll just go grocery shopping on Sunday. Guys and gals, I know I'm gonna get hit hard for posting this but I'll do it anyways. It's my ex's birthday in a few weeks. Just last week, my decision of not sending her a card was pretty much the decision I was going to follow through with. Recently, I've really been thinking about it. My ex is a strong minded person. I'm gonna go ahead and send her a very unique card, specifically for her and only her. I customized it. I won't put my name on it. This is where getting to know your ex very well really comes in handy. Also, since she's really caught up in college and trying her best to get in the nursing program, I bought her a top notch book that helps to get into a nursing program. I know for a fact that she will appreciate it because she really wants to make it in the program! I also bought a new album of one of her favorite bands with a song she really likes. I'm gonna wrap these gifts. Along doing all of that, I'm not showing any hint of trying to get back with her at this time. I'm sending those gifts because I care about her and her success in life. It's her 21st so it's a big birthday. The only reason why I'm following through with this is because I already accept that I most likely will not get anything back in return. Without writing my name on the birthday card, to me, it's in between not sending her a card and sending her a card. These are also gifts that are specifically unique just for her. Even the birthday card is unique for her, as it has her favorite dog in her favorite color, standing on top of a whole bunch of college books, and the dog wearing a birthday cone hat with "21" written on it. The night before her birthday (bday is on the 30th), I'm gonna drop these off in front of her porch so in the morning she will be surprised. My ex loves surprises and I know for a fact that she won't see this coming. The gifts and card will be in a medium sized birthday bag.
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I know your pain bro. I've been in that state of mind at it really, really sucks.
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Day 11 I didn't really do anything special today. It was my day off and I also have a day off tomorrow. I think I'm getting paid tomorrow and if I do, I'm planning on buying groceries. I didn't really think about her that much today except for now.. obviously. It's definitely getting easier every day. Every once in a while, I get thoughts of her flirting and trying to get to know someone else, but I made a deal with her and I promise I won't break it. Everything is getting so much easier, but it doesn't change the fact that I love her with all my life. I can definitely hit it off with another girl. I choose not to because first, I want to focus on my health, job, education, and just doing things for myself. Second, I love my ex so much and if I end up hitting it off with another girl, I'm not going to feel good about it, even though it might give me an ego boost. As of now, my focus is all on just ME and ONLY ME.
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Day 10 I felt pretty good about things today. I don't really have much else to say. Maybe I'm just tired.
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Day 9 I was so tired coming into work this morning because my lack of sleep last night. I ended up going to Navy College Office today to get information about college. I figured out what I want to major in and all that good stuff. That's pretty much what I've been thinking about most of the day. This evening, I went for a long run again. It felt good, but my legs were kinda sore to begin with. After that, I decided to go to the bookstore and just do some general reading. I ended up reading that book "How to Get Your Lover Back." That's actually a really good book! I will end up buying the book because all the book does is give you positive insight about true love and being a better person. There are so many different scenarios put into that book of just ex's leaving and ways they got the ex back. It's a good read and I recommend people who are always at lost for hope, take a look at the book. Now I'm ready to go to bed since I have work tomorrow.
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Day 8 I'm really tired right now so I'm gonna try to make this short. Today this morning at work, I received this unknown text from an unknown number. I ignored it because I honestly thought it was her. The text said "Hey, how are you doing?" Haha so yeah I thought it was my ex. It made me think the whole day and kinda gave me some ego boost. Then tonight I kinda just gave in and said something like "I'm sorry for the late reply.. I've been so busy lately.. may I ask who this is?" something like that. Then I found out that it was a wrong number after all. I ended up calling the number and it was a guy so yeah.. haha. Honestly, I felt a little disappointed, but happy too that it wasn't her after all. I just want this no contact to be smooth sailing and just talk to her again when I'm fully ready to. So ya, that was the biggest thing that happened today. I thought about her a lot today and kept on thinking if she's with someone else. I knew I had to not think like that. So I ended up going to Barnes and Noble and I started reading this book called something like "How to Win Your Lover Back" and I thought it was gonna be cute and funny because the color of the book was ugly and ya it didn't look serious so I just wanted to see what it had inside. Surprisingly, this book makes me feel so much better when I'm thinking about her. It just talks about... true love lol. I also took this quiz to see if my ex was worth it to get back and I passed with flying colors lol. But you have to be honest with all the answers! It's a pretty good read. I'm probably gonna end up buying it because just reading some of these stories couples go through, it makes you feel less "lonelier" lol.
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Usually when they act like this, they're just trying to feel better about themselves and justify the breakup. Just try to ignore it and you'll be fine. She WILL notice it too! She's expecting you to say something so ya just don't give her that momentum. You're doing the right thing though, you're checking her page fewer and fewer.. stay calm and "move on" and she will notice.
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All I have to say is.. try not to expect him to contact you. I'm sure he still cares about you, but just let him do his own thing. Give him this space and this time provided for you, and like everyone here says, improve yourself!
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Day 7 I'm still at work and it's one of those workdays where I have to stay overnight. I'm in the navy and every once a week, we have to stay overnight on the ship. I pretty much having nothing else to do anymore for the rest of the night other than surf around the internet and hopefully go to bed soon. I miss her... I feel it, but I'm staying strong and moving forward until it's time for me to contact her again. She needs this space... I need this space... whether or not she'll become a better person in the future, I know for a fact that I'm going to rock her world the next time she sees me. I want to become a better person and I'm taking baby steps. One day at a time..
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Sounds like you're doing great! Glad to hear
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Day 6 I woke up late today because I decided to sleep in since I have to go to work tomorrow.. on a Sunday! I felt like crap today.. emotionally. I found out where I feel like crap the most... inside my room. I decided to go for a run and I made a good decision. I needed to get out of the state of mind I was in earlier. I ran a long distance, pretty fast. It felt great! Then I went to the bookstore to read some books. I bought myself a cookbook because I always wanted to learn how to cook and I told her that I'm going to learn how to cook when we have this time apart. As of now, I'm feeling fine. I don't wanna go to work tomorrow because I already know work is going to be slow. Stay strong guys. Exercising definitely helps relieve stress and emotions.
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Hang in there bro. We're all here for you too
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Yeah my post got posted up twice... -.-'
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Day 5 TGIF!! I had a short work day today. I got off around 11am. I went to the gym to workout around 6pm and got done around 8pm. I got invited to a party to drink and catch up with a few buddies. I caught up with a really good friend of mine whom I haven't talked to in so long. So he told me he wants to break up with his girlfriend because she's acting too immature coming home drunk every night from parties and she's being too needy. I told him to just do what you have to do and also never expected her act like that. So the fact that I'm not the only one who's going through problems, kinda made me feel a little better. Tonight was a good night.. I talked to a few really cute looking girls, took a few shots, caught up with one of my best friends, and now I'm home typing this. We arranged some plans to go out to clubs, theme parks, and other places we haven't done in a while. It's gonna get better... my ex won't get the best of me!
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Day 4 Work went by so fast. It's only when during the evening, my emotions of my ex are THERE. It sucks, but I gotta stay strong. I told my ex that we needed this space and I won't break that commitment. I have to stay strong, I have to stray strong, I HAVE TO STAY STRONG! Goodnight fellas BTW, I saw that my ex still has her same AIM username. Now I know there is at least ONE line of communication lol. I WILL NOT SEND HER A MESSAGE! I gotta get through this...
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Day 3 Work was really, really slow. I stayed in my room today because I was exhausted and sore from my workout session yesterday.
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Day 2 I think about her, but that's normal. I'm always telling myself to just focus on myself and let things work out itself. I applied for college today. I'm planning for 210 days of NC and I will post EVERY SINGLE DAY!
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Day 1 Woohoo I made it through this boring work day lol.
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Day 2 for me