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Ixtapa

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Everything posted by Ixtapa

  1. Ixtapa
    Feeling okay but still thinking about him all the time....and hoping that he will pick up the phone at some point and call me (or send me an email...or add me on facebook....or, or, or...
  2. Ixtapa
    Soon it will be two weeks since I sent him my last message (its been 3 weeks since we last saw each other and talked). I think about him a lot and wonder if he is okay....but I do not feel like contacting him...I dont have his phone number and I know he would not answer if I sent him an email.... Im okay I guess...
  3. Ixtapa
    Feeling much better today. Hopefully it will last. Have been doing some relaxation exercises and taken Bach Flowers....not sure if it helped or if it is just a placebo effect....but in any case Im feeling much more at peace with myself
  4. Ixtapa
    R.A.S (nothing worth mentioning)...
  5. Ixtapa
    I wonder what he is doing....I wish I wouldnt think so much about him
  6. Ixtapa
    Yes...I actually noticed that my guy was drinking A LOT more than he used to right before we split up (complicated situation I do not wish to explain here). In any case, he had to deal with a lot of stuff and "escaped" by drinking way too much at weekends. I believe we had a lot of conflicts due to his drinking...
  7. Ixtapa
    Im asking myself the same question. Sometimes I think Im insane
  8. Ixtapa
    Still very tempted to send him an email. Can't stop thinking about him today. Wondering how he is doing as he just moved and is settling down in a new place. He is probably so busy that he doesnt think about me for one minute !! Anyway...its hard
  9. Ixtapa
    Terribly tempted to send him an email. We cut contact after a conflict which was mostly due to his bad behavior towards me. Still...he just moved to my part of the world yesterday (from the middle-east to europe) and I would like him to know that Im not angry at him anymore and that I wish him well. I cannot stand unresolved conflicts...and this one is much more difficult to deal with than others coz Im still in love with him. Guess I should still do NC.....and see if I still feel like emailing him in 30 days or more. If he does have feelings for me still, those will not fade away in just a few weeks, right ?? Im so restless it actually hurts....
  10. Ixtapa
    Still thinking of him but Im okay. I know that there is nothing I can do to fix this situation.....except give him enough time to start to actually MISS ME. Then it will be his choice to contact me again or not....and if he does, I will be feeling all the better for it. I have been depressed for a while (for reasons unrelated to him) and my priority is to work on myself now. I couldn't care less about Valentine's....my ex was from a country where they dont celebrate it
  11. Ixtapa
    Woke up thinking about him as usual. He is moving to another country tomorrow so I will not have his phone number anymore which is probably a good thing (I almost texted him yesterday night). It is just weird to think I will not know where he is exactly anymore. I used to picture him in his apartment and at the bars & clubs we used to go to together.
  12. Ixtapa
    I dont know...I have done that in the past too and I found out that even though it would make me feel better the next day (I think it has to do with the hormones that are released into your brain....sorry to sound so "unromantic") it would also make me feel way worse a couple days later. Would be curious to know if you still feel better a couple days from now (provided you dont get back together of course).
  13. Ixtapa
    How I wish that my (ex-) guy would think like that !!!!
  14. Ixtapa
    That's what I thought. At the moment, I have no desire to contact him AT ALL. I am angry at him still and do not want to give him the pleasure of showing him that I am "weak" Still...I might get weak later on and feel like contacting him again. So yes, he is gone .....for the next 4 weeks at least...
  15. Ixtapa
    Today is hard again. Not in a great mood for other reasons and the situation with him doesn't help. I still can't deal with the fact that he didnt apologize (or even explain) his stupid behavior of the last couple weeks. He deleted me on Facebook and might have deleted me on MSN too...but in any case he forgot to "block" me so I can still see when he is online (like right now). I do not wish to block him as I would like to give him the opportunity to contact me on MSN at a later date if he wishes too (not NOW though). So should I delete him on MSN for the time being so I won't see when he is online ? Mmmh...I think I just answered to my own question....I will delete him for the next 28 days and see how I feel at the end of this challenge
  16. Ixtapa
    Day 2 I totally agree....I just thought that if by any chance I do NOT think about him one day, I should not force myself to post on here. Forgetting about him would be a good sign that Im slowly healing which is NOT the case right now. Today is really hard. I have so many unanswered questions in my head and I keep analyzing every little thing he said and did. To make things even more complicated, I am currently unemployed and I should be looking for a job but its hard to find the energy and motivation
  17. Ixtapa
    I am definitely planning on doing NC for the next 29 days (possibly much more than that, unless he comes up with a really good apology). Still, Im thinking I might not be posting every day. Someone told me to try and push all thoughts of him away when they come up. It might be counterproductive to my healing to be posting on here too much....as others on this thread have suggested. I will definitely post if I fail to keep NC though ! Good luck to everybody on the challenge...it is certainly not easy
  18. Ixtapa
    I keep going back to day one. Got very angry over something yesterday and attempted contact on MSN. He didnt reply of course. Long story and I dont regret contacting him. He behaved like an idiot towards one of my friends and I wanted him to KNOW that Im aware of the whole story (as he probably thought she would not tell). Anyway....now its over, finito, terminé, khalas
  19. Ixtapa
    Aaaaaargh....I couldnt help myself and sent him a message on MSN (to which, of course, he didnt reply). Blah. Just forget it. ](*,) It has to get better than this ???? I am SO OBSESSIVE over this guy. This has never happenened to me before (well, not THAT bad in any case). I need to get my head checked
  20. Ixtapa
    Very hard today as one of his best friends (and a friend of mine too) called me from the foreign country they both live in and we had a chat. Talking to her was actually really nice....but brought back all the memories of the times we spent together. Anyway, I was crying tonight. Hopefully I will start feeling better really soon. I am tired of feeling bad. I am tired of having the false hope that he will come back to his senses and call me (and apologize, and, and, and). Life is hard....
  21. Ixtapa
    Thanks Brazilgirl....I do hope that things will start to get better soon enough. I have way too much time to think these days (I am not working at the moment and looking for a new job). Being at home most of the time doesnt help Doing okay though...
  22. Ixtapa
    Feeling fine although I can't help but think of him all the time. Yesterday two of my good friends saw him at the club we used to go to. For some weird reason it makes me feel better that they saw him. He is in a foreign country and it is part of the reason why broke up...we also had a lot of missunderstandings due to cultural differences. Guess he thought the relationship wa not worth fighting for, considering I was going to go back home eventually. Anyway......I do have to be strong and not contact him for at least 30 days !
  23. Ixtapa
    Well....just sent him a text a couple hours ago...so I guess Im back to day one. Hopefully I will make it through the 30 days this time
  24. Ixtapa
    He is on MSN right now....but I blocked him so he doesnt know Im online. I will be okay, but for now I really really miss him
  25. Ixtapa
    Day 1, yet again. Will definitely keep with NC for 30 days this time (well, unless he contacts me and apologizes for his stupid behavior). Otherwise, Im gone, gone, gone.... It will be hard coz I care about him an awful lot....but Im not willing to be with a guy who is selfish and disrespectful. I blocked him on MSN so I wont be tempted to contact him (and this way he wont see when Im online anymore).
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