Sarah Smith

My ex friend used to visit me all the time and she kept saying I am her best friend. We would hang out all the time. Back then we lived in different cities. Then she moved to my city and only a 5 minute walk down the block. Ever since she has been ignoring my texts and my attempts to see her. I think she got new friends and forgot about me. Back in the day she had no other friends and was even bullied, I would always give her support. I care about the people in my life and I take friendship seriously. Right now I feel used. How do I deal with this?

So Im a young adult, only 21, most my friends still live at home. But I lived in a different city to study and I’ll soon be done with my degree. I am really close with my mum, and currently don’t have a family of my own. My mother suddenly one day informed me she plans on leaving the country? She just wants to live elsewhere. She informed me I can come along, but she also made it clear that shes going no matter if Im coming or not. Am I selfish for thinking that she’s being a bad person. I feel like this is making my abandonment issues worse. Who is in the wrong here?

yeah it’s suddenly more frequent, but it might be because Ive been meeting a lot of new people lately because Ive been attending events (profesional business events). But maybe Im over sensitive idk

I tell them it’s inappropriate but try to keep it light. But I guess I should set more clear boundaries. Examples of what I have been told: guy friend (we haven’t been friends for long) telling me the sexual stuff he would want to do to me. A girl who keeps saying stuff about my body and curves and that I have “sexy shapes”. A friend pretty much trying to sit in my lap and touch me and stuff. A guy who got into me and my friends hotel room, he was flirting with her not me. Then he diverted his attention towards me. I ignored him because he previously commented on my breasts and joked that he’ll buy protection for later and took photos of me without consent. I made it very clear Im not interested, told him off and was even mean. When I wasn’t paying attention to him he would literally kick my butt. And in general a lot of guys and girls saying I have a nice butt. This I usually just take as a compliment and move on. Am I crazy and overreacting for thinking that all this is too much? Is this normal? Should I just suck it up? Btw we live in a pretty progressive country so it’s not like this is the culture at all

It’s mostly been from friends and acquaintances now. I quit my job because of this.

I dress the same as I always have. Sometimes revealing and other times very baggy, usually a mix (one baggy and one tight item). But lately Ive been into the vintage style, so I wear a lot of baggy pants, so according to this logic they wouldn’t be commenting on my butt but they are.

Yes that’s what I thought. But lately its been happening like at least once a day, and by both genders.. and when I tell them they brush it off like Im crazy. Thats why Im wondering if Im overreacting

I keep getting comments on my body from a lot of different people. Classmates, co-workers and even friends. Many of them say straight up sexual things to me about how nice my a** is or what sexual things they would do to me. And this comes from both women and men. Is this normal?? Am I oversensitive if it makes me uncomfortable? Before, it would happen here and there so Id brush it off. But now it happens all the time, and from people I wouldn’t expect it from.

Yeah you might be right! No he didn’t message me🤔 although he directly asked for my contact so that we can “link later”, so confusing…

I met him at a surfing club🙈 some girl I befriended told me when I brought him up

A guy I met asked for my contact info after we had a conversation. We exchanged instagrams. After about a week he unfollowed me suddenly? It was after I posted a picture also I heard a rumour he has a girlfriend, but I don’t know. Why would he ask me for my contact and then remove me? Why ask in the first place

I guess I tend to see the best in people I have an emotional attachment to and that leads me to giving way too many chances and compromise my self worth. But you are right, enough is enough. And I should probably do some self reflection on what leads me to allow people to treat me this poorly

This is a good response, I’ll take your advice, thank you

Thank you🙏

Like a year.. I’m not sure, I broke up because he was flaky, mean and unreliable. But he kind of made it back into my life, and then he made up some story (again) about something false and left on several occasions

Me and my ex had a pretty turbulent breakup. But we ended up being on good terms, because I tried really hard to keep the peace and at least make things okay between us, like two adults. We were on talking terms and everything was okay, although he sometimes randomly accused me of things , like sleeping with others, to which I told him it’s non of his business because we broke up, but for his info I am not. And then suddenly one day he sent me a message telling me I’m worth everything and that he loves me. I took a couple of days to think about these messages, because I was worried I’d take him back and he would keep up his sporadic behavior and baling, which hurts my feelings. When I didn’t respond for a while to think about these big words, he sent a message that I’m supposed to just forget it. I apologized for not answering more quickly but told him I needed some time to reflect and that I’ll eventually respond, and that life has also been busy lately. And then he out of the blue, for no reason blocked me on every media, no explanation, nothing . Just disappeared. Keep in mind he has a history of sporadic and unpredictable behavior with bizarre reasons. But this left me in the dark and I feel stuck thinking about it. It’s just extremely hurtful and bizarre that someone tells you they love you and the next thing they do is block, without the recipient even having done or said anything to deserve it. Any tips for this situation?

I’m afraid I’ll never get over him. The relationship was not good for me, that’s why it had to end. He would treat me (and most other people in his life) like they don’t matter, to the point where he lost a lot of friends. He was extremely unreliable. I had to beg for the bare minimum, we would love-breadcrumb me. He would say and do hurtful things. He himself had lots of issues he didn’t want to resolve, but was extremely hard on me for the smallest mistake, almost unforgiving. And he was giving attention to other women. And still, he would always say I’m too good for him and that I shouldn’t be with him. I knew this would destroy me over time, I did what I had to do. But oh my god it hurts. I haven’t seen him for over 4 months, and it’s as strong as never. Despite all his flaws, there was something incredibly special about him. It cannot be put into words. We had an undeniable connection. Even the day we met, felt almost like we had known each other for years. I’m very realistic about love, I’ve never had this thought before, not even about exes I was with for years. But I’m afraid I’ll never feel this way about anyone again. I’m afraid I’ll never be able to move on a 100%. But I also know going back isn’t the solution, because he would never really love me back. No matter how much of myself I’d give and sacrifice. What do I do?

So me and my ex boyfriend broke up, it was kinda mutual (and messy), so it’s hard to say who was the one to “end it”. Anyways, I guess he had the last “say”. I blocked him because it was really painful and I needed space. The next few days after the break-up he found a way around me blocking him and contacted me over a different messaging app I forgot about. He sent several messages, and would delete some and keep some up. I didn’t respond. But now, about two weeks later, when I had cooled down and wasn’t all worked up and angry I decided to respond. I deeply care about this man, so I didn’t want to leave him in the dark. I didn’t say I want him back (because I don’t due to the way he treats me, although I miss him), I just explained my feelings around the situation and said some nice things to make it easier on him. He has been active online, but he hasn’t even opened the message… And this makes the break-up so much more hurtful for me. I was already hesitant about responding, so now I feel stupid. to give a bit of context about the relationship; we were together for about 10 months. We had some issues, a lot of the time he would say and do really hurtful things (part of why I blocked), and he just never seemed to care about me truly, at least not as much as I did. Anyone have any idea what this means, and why he is ignoring me when he reached out first?

So my now ex was liking girls inappropriate pics on instagram all the time. Even girls he knew and in his area… I told him multiple times it bothers me but he didn’t stop. He even gave out his socials to girls at bars… Well, I was like fine, we are playing by the same rules then. And I liked one guys photo. And my ex broke up with me because I liked ONE photo?!? After everything he did I just feel like I’ve been done wrong and like this is super unfair. How do I deal with the aftermath of this?

So like the title says, my boyfriend gave his instagram to some girl he met at a bar. She is attractive, and she was flirting with him. He says he didn’t do anything else and that he wasn’t flirting. I just find that story to be hard to believe, and I don’t think it’s okay to exchange socials with someone you met at a bar / club if you are in a relationship. Should I just dump him? context: we are doing long distance at the moment bc of uni

So a lot of people have told me I look angry / not approachable. I’m almost never angry, I’m generally a happy person. Many of my close friends admitted they were scared of approaching me before we were friends because of my “*** face”. But that I’m actually the nicest person once they get to know me. Ive lost two customer service jobs because of this, because I look “angry” and co-workers / guests don’t like it. Although I try my best to look nice and smile more. Let me add that I’m a bit of an introvert and I often get lost in my own thoughts. It just really hurts how much people judge me just based off how I look.. and losing those jobs made me feel like there is something wrong with me to be fair I don’t even have a question to ask, I just wanted to get this weight off my chest 😞 anyone experiencing anything similar?

I did my masters there. He’s 30. I got several visa options, we have looked into it. We were together more than 6 months. I know that’s what bothers me. He keeps telling me to come back, but I have to be the one doing all the work and the sacrifices, and I don’t like that We have an amazing connection irl, but it doesn’t translate well through phone

That is a very wise answer thank you! We were together more than 6 months when I left… Yeah but do you think it’s likely he is cheating or could it be something else? That’s what’s bothering me, the not knowing

So I have a long distance boyfriend. I lived abroad for a while and that’s where we met. I am planning to move back to be with him, I just have to finish some things back home, it will take about half a year. we have been doing long distance for about 2 months, until now everything was fine but now I’m getting suspicious He was never a good texter and he doesn’t enjoy talking on the phone too much, and I’m okay with that, I got a busy schedule. But now he texts back even less and he never really calls, and he got more free time than ever. On the weekends he barely responds to me and he is always supposedly “hanging with the boys” but never tell me who they are. Also he has started liking inappropriate photos on social media, something he never did before. And I’m suddenly not the person he sends snapchats to the most, for the first time in two months. Is it rational that I’m starting to suspect cheating?

Thank you!