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EJA32

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Everything posted by EJA32

  1. EJA32
    Day 1 I guess The ex sent me a couple of texts on the back of the card thanking me for it but then didn't reply. Feel like absolute , rightly or wrongly I had hoped that the card could generate dialogue and probably naively some kind of meet up. She told me she loved the card and that the aftershave I put on there was a warming familiar scent I asked how her bday was and then no reply/ feel like crap I guess she will never come back ever.
  2. EJA32
    The card seems to have gone down well. Not sure on next steps
  3. EJA32
    Almost certainly is man, on tender hooks now awaiting any kind of response hooing it can kick dialogue back off
  4. EJA32
    It is strange that she would be playing with you like that man. I'm not sure what the intention would be as like you said it seems she is definitely sowing a seed for contact. but its the motives for that contact which concern me, is she just trying to see if you are still interested or is she doing it to reach out? I obviously have no idea about htegirl so no clue, how was she when you were starting up the relationship? many games? I really have no idea what to think, she is one of those people who dont like to show any kind of weakness and her health issues are one of those things. That is why it was such a huge thing that she let me in on that issue. I dont know if i have been silly or not but i would like to think that my card will make her smile, all i have ever wanted to do was to make her smile. One embarassing thing i did was to put a squirt of my aftershave in the envelope as she used to say she loved it. Would you expect a response in my position? I am hoping it tarts a dialogue to be honest but who knows. I get exactly what you are saying, Jacqui's reply to this card is very much the same for me. I am worried that she will either completely ignore it or it wont mean anything to her. I tried to keep the card as neutral as possible with just a little in-joke in there that'll hopefully remind her of good times. You can message me anytime if you would rather speak privately. Ed
  5. EJA32
    It almost sounds like she is trying to iniate some kind of comms by going through your friend but it does sound a bit strange if you dont mind me saying so. It just seems like everything is ok with her where as i am still devastated. She told me she didnt know if she was doing the right thing when she broke up with me and i do believe she isnt. It all stemmed from issues from previous relationships where trust has been wiped away. I know i shouldnt of sent a card as per the NC rules but she has been let down in the past and its my way of saying 'I'm still here, I meant every word'. I just wonder if all her feelings have completely died for me. Not sure what to suggest, what is your heart telling you to do?
  6. EJA32
    I feel exactly the same brody regarding wnating to make contact but also feel utterly hopeless without any contact from the my ex as this seems to suggest she doesnt want to speak to me again. I am starting to think my ex no longer cares for me at all. Seeing her this morning all happy was like a massive punch to the stomach. I;m not really sure what to suggest for you. Do you feel she is being genuine?
  7. EJA32
    Seeing you smiling and singing along to music in your car this morning without a care in the world has killed me. You are my everything or should that be were, and you look to be happy without me in your life and i was reduced to tears. I miss you, I miss us and I miss how I was with you. Everything was great in those days together and now I am alone and miserable pining ot be back with you supporting you and loving you. Please please please Jacqui give me another chance to be your man.
  8. EJA32
    Thanks again guys. I have been seeing a counsellor and she said that I need to stay true to myself so I did send the card last night. I wrote a very basic message of 'Happy Birthday, hope you have a great day'. I thought it was the nice thing to do. I have had an emotional setback this morning however. I saw her in her car singing and smiling whilst on my way to work, she was a fair distance from where she lives so all kinds of questions have gone through my head. I just feel so low seeing her so apparently happy knowing she almost certainly doe snot think of me.
  9. EJA32
    I love you so much Jacqui. Can;t believe after all our hope and dreams you are out of my life, you are always in my mind and heart but after the split and contact I really don;t think I am that to you any more. If you told me what I needed to get you back I wouldn;t hesitate. I am fed up of crying and want to be back laughing with you in my arms again. You are so beautiful and I felt like the happiest man alive now i feel like i have lost everything. Would love to try and work things out, to support you through this difficult period. I love you so much.
  10. EJA32
    I get what you;re saying mate I just don;t want to lose the memories of when I have been my happiest. She completed me and now i feel alone and vulnerable worried that I am 'out of sight, out of mind'. If you were me, you would totally leave it? Even if it means that i will never have contact again? She has invited me to he rleaving drinks (she is moving intra dept at work) not usre if i should go or totally leave it.
  11. EJA32
    I am worried she has absolutely no doubts and I;m the only one hurting. Find myseld clinging on to old memories and little things she's said. This love thing is amazing when it is going smooth but a bump in the road and you're left completely devastated.
  12. EJA32
    Am I the only one who cant help but look through the old messages? Got some truly lovely ones that remind me of the good times but then the good times make me upset now. Regarding the card 3Tears, I understand what you are saying I just feel like if i don't do somehthing no matter how small I'll never get her back. Does that make any sense? She told me not to wait around for her but I really don;t want to give up as feel like this is it for me
  13. EJA32
    I can't help but keep looking on her whatsapp wondering who she is speaking to. Kills me. I just feel like she is slipping through my fingers
  14. EJA32
    I really don't know what to do love her so much and hurts me that I haven't spoken to her for so long. Would be sending the card hoping to restart things if I'm honest
  15. EJA32
    Why do you think that? Just want her to know I'm thinking of her on her birthday.
  16. EJA32
    My ex is quite stubborn, she admitted for the first month she massively regretted splitting with me but didnt want to try again. I am worried I'll lose her through her stubborness not to contact. What are you planning to do? I am hoping sending a birthday card will show her that I love her still and always think of her.
  17. EJA32
    I really felt you were the one and still do. You mean so much to me and provided me with the happiest period of my life. It hurts so much that issues from your past are stopping us being together and that you wont fight for what is right and that is that I am by your side making you happy once again. I will cherish the memories in time and hope to add to them but right now I dont see a happy ending based on the NC and you not reaching out. I love you JAcqui and want to be with you till the day i die.
  18. EJA32
    Hi Guys, new to the forum but been observing NC for 22 days. It hurts like hell and is incredibly difficult. It will be 4 weeks next wednesday and it's her birthday I plan to send a card as I still love her to bits. Only thing is she hasnt iniated any conversation apart from the day after we last spoke face to face (start of NC) and inclusing me on a group party invite (which i didnt respond to). Cant stop thinking of her still and worrying that through NC she will think I dont care or forgoet all about me. Anyone else have similar feelings?
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