Responsible, well upbrought, charismatic, beautiful...

Hi everybody!

In the following post I'm asking your opinion about a relationship with a specific girl.

I must say that I have managed several personal developments in the past few months. But in spite of developments, there are always questions in sentimental life.

As I may have talked about it in past posts, my personal development was characterized especially by one week in a foreign camp where I was able to unfold the maximum of my personality, which was limited for so many years by the Past and everything bound to it (schoolmates pissing off, etc. etc.). The greatest acquirement was the fact that in that foreign youth camp I was sort of the most charismatic, most player and most admired by the women. Quote who knows to seduce women, is also able to seduce the world!"

I was not only a hero of girls, but I was also thoughtful, helpful, gentleman, etc. with everyone.

Infact, I had reached my dream to be the friend of everyone, I repeat: everyone, and, maybe as a natural consequence, was also building up a relationship with my counterpart/twin individual: the most social, charismatic, etc. girl in that place.

Among all the people I've met in my life, she is probably, apart from certain celebrities, one of those who most perfectly blends intelligence, good upbringing, beauty and social responsibility.

It was a dream that had come true, but in that week I wasn't yet THAT much developed in order to engage in sexual activity with this girl, which would have surely permitted the relationship to continue in future...

Unfortunately, all that lasted only one week, and as I returned home I was again among those people who had convinced me in years and years of being an idiot, unsocial, unsuccessful with girls, nerd, only good at scoring high marks at school (this in a certain way includes my own parents). So I was helplessly switched back to my negative status and had to live with it for months, in which, nevertheless, I tried to do my best to achieve the same effects I had gained in that youth camp. My effort had been repaid, but not enough.

Back at home, from the looser-nerd I had developed into a sort of friend-of-all-but-no-attraction/love/sex (it's always the girls who bed me).

Until now that had irritated me a lot... but I managed to realize another dream!

Thanks to my patience, I managed to invite certain people from the summer camp to my home, including the girl that was infatuated with me.

I must tell you that the first time I had met them I was feeling totally free, spontaneous, and safety-inspiring with a little Neurolinguistic Programmation to create rapport, etc.

But the second time is what brings me to write this post:

their visit totally enlightened me! I now don't care anymore about all the automatic negative thoughts in me and always behave "as maximum of myself as possible", without being influenced by negative feedback from my older friends.

In change it seems, though, that my new friends, those who characterize my maximum myself, had to taste a bit of my older self, of my negative-minded side, of my less spontaneous side, and less woman-hero side.

Infact, even this time I wasn't able to engage physically with this girl.

It seems as if time itself has done its job in the attraction/chemistry between the two of us.

My most possible theory is that she had come here expecting me to be [still] the most valuable player, most charismatic, etc. etc. and that I would have given her a wonderful time... and that's exactly what I didn't do!

Maybe it's because of the few negative thoughts that have remained in me, maybe even because I don't know (YET!) exactly how to lead someone into the bed, or maybe because there's a moral block in me holding me from it because I overheard that she has a boyfriend.

I often consult forums of speed seducers, people whose target seems to be only sexual satisfaction, but all they can tell me is "Too late! If you want to have sex, forget her!".

That's why I need a more... "humanistic" approach!

You have already understood that my final target is not sex, but for me, sex is a vehicle to obtain eternal relationship with a person, to give someone extreme happiness and joy. That seems to be scientifically proven, right?

Now, she remained here only three days, and I must sadly admit that as the days passed, the amount of positive feedback giving evidence to her infatuation always went downwards:

Initially there were many seducing smiles and eyeglances, she often followed my pace and stayed more with me than with her friends. Very often her friends also came out with statements such as:

"Hey, I remember you had something with Nwadour..." She

"Come on! You're behaving like this just because Nwadour is there!" She sorry!"

"You're totally different..."

...

Whenever I talked with her, she often used self-association, meaning yes, also I.../me too, just like you, etc." From what I've learned, that is the most powerful technique for subconsciously making two people feel connected. But there were always automatic negative thoughts in my brain, and I suppose I couldn't keep up with her flow!

Once, we discovered that our dreams in life were the same, and she told that we were "soulmates".

The same evening, at the discotheque, some kind of horny guy managed to dance with her, while I was talking to other people... Maybe she spotted my disappointment and stopped. That night, her "goodnight embrace/kiss" was very strong.

When she had come I had set the target to give her AT LEAST one romantic, unforgettable night, but I hadn't done it... because I was at home? Because of my A.N.T.s? Who knows...

But I didn't want to stay like that... I was really getting nervous about the fewer positive nonverbal signs.

Finally (!), when we were in front of the train and she was about to leave, we hugged quite immensely, then I gave her a cryptic message: in her language, it would mean something like really admire you a lot and to me you are very valuable/important!" I wanted to leave her confused, unsure about what I really meant with it.

She replied with the same words.

I couldn't tell her "I love you!" right there, after not having done anything at all in those 3 days, after having probably given her the impression of not being an (sexually) attractive person.

After she went, I didn't have ANY anchors at all at home. I was a new person. I had achieved my goal of eliminating my negative thoughts.

Now, I know perfectly that I can simply go out and pick up as many girls as I want, that the world is full of women and "that love doesn't exist": these are the rules of the seducers.

Nevertheless, my deepest feelings and my deepest intelligence combines me to that girl and regrets for not having done anything concrete with her when I had the opportunity.

She would be one of the few girls for whom I would give up my "playing around" and develop a serious, responsible relationship. I am not a person who only follows my emotions but I also scrutinize, I analyse the values of the person and then decide. She is a very strong candidate.

That's why I would like to hear your opinion:

how should I behave in future with this girl in order to obtain something truly serious between us?

One of my favourite visualisations: myself in her city, picking up her friends and showing her that indeed I am sexually attractive, thereby feeding her chemistry (maybe by making her a bit jealous and craving). But that's better said than done!

What are your suggestions?

Another question: what is, according to you, the strongest "eternal" connection that there can be between a girl and a boy? Do you think I have the basic elements to have one with her?

Thanks, and have a nice day

P.S.: I MUST add one more stupid thing I did... really stupid, stupid, stupid: she offered me dinner and I accepted... I was SO immersed in my thoughts that I idiot accepted... I didn't behave like a MAN!