Help me I dont know what to do

[midgetporn]

I was in a serious relationship with my ex for 2 years and now she broke up with me, and all I want is to have her back. She is the mother of my son, she wont contact me, she wont even bring my son over so I can see him. All I ever wanted for my son was for him to have a happy family, I wanted to be able to sit by his mother and cheer for him togather at any of his accademic events. I dont even know what I did wrong. I know she's upset at me for calling the police, but I called the police because my son doesnt diserve to be in a room full of pot heads smoking around him. He cant fend for himself, its not like he can just leave the room. Though I still love his mother because I have been through so much hard and happy times togather. I just want her back in my life, so my son and I can have a happy family. She had great goals in life, and I would love for her to complete them. I hurt so much its pathetic. I know I still love her because I will do anything in my power to be a family again, I just dont know how to get her back

[melrich]

Your son is the most important thing here at the moment. If she is exposing him to unsuitable environments that is the first thing you need to focus on. See a lawyer, get some advice and a court order concerning custody. Once you have your son sorted you can then think about the relationship.

[midgetporn]

Though I know you are right, but I think it is important for my son to have a family.

[melrich]

Though I know you are right, but I think it is important for my son to have a family

 

Worry about that later. First make sure he is safe and in an appropriate environment.

[midgetporn]

I have done everything in my power for that, lawyers have turned me down because fathers rarely get custody of the child in this state. The police officer didnt make any arrests even though he found pot, his reason was nobody claimed it, he also told me that the place he is living in is a pretty suitable environment. With help like that, my confidence drops.

[melrich]

That is disheartening. Do you have proof of the fact that she is using drugs around your son?

[midgetporn]

I walked in while she was smoking, the only proof I have is on the police report saying the substance was found. I even went through the trouble of taking a drug test to prove I was clean and a more suitable parent.

[melrich]

How old is your son?

[midgetporn]

5 and a half months

[midgetporn]

You know everyone keeps telling me I diserve better, but I know I wont ever feel the same way with sombody else. Everyone tells me that she was stupid for breaking up everything we have been through togather. I choose not to listen because I have always been told in life to do what makes me happy. The only thing that would make me happy would be to have my family back.

[melrich]

The only thing that would make me happy would be to have my family back.

 

That may be how you feel but you shouldn't. You have to have fall back positions because you have too much invested in just one outcome.

 

You need to think about fallback positions. You need to mostly think about your son and how this is going to best resolve for him (and that may not necessarily be the 2 of you getting back together.)

 

You need to start thinking about your options and making some plans. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

[midgetporn]

I know your right, but its so hard getting over the fact that I once had a family. I was happy because I did have sombody to fall back on and did she. Now im miserable I feel like I dont have anything to do anymore except wait for my heart to stop beating. People always tell me like its a piece of cake to get over it. We all know its not just that easy.

[melrich]

It's not a piece of cake but it's also not impossible. Start planning. You will find it is empowering to feel likle you are at least doing something.

[midgetporn]

Well maybe its me, maybe I have my heart set on one thing. Love is hard to just give up on, especially when my love was not only the love for the girl but the simple fact I love my family. My son right now is my first priority, but like I said I dont think it is fair for him to grow up without a family. I think he need both parents working togather to love and support him. My love is not set on the girl but it is set on the family.