LDR AND Online Dating Site

[LOUVRE]

I've been in a transatlantic LDR for the last few months. We met on one of those online sites which is geared not only for romance but friendships as well. We finally met and really hit it off. As a matter of fact it went great! Then we both returned to our respective homes. Yes, some of you are probably nodding right now, he starting getting a bit weird - pulling back and not communicating. I understood this may be natural so I backed off as well. When I thought the time was right I brought it up and all seemed well again. The problem is he is still visiting the web site where we met and seems to be on it quite a long time. I'm more than a little freaked by this. BTW, I know this because I have two sign-ons to the site (due to reasons that had nothing to do with this relationship) and when he was acting weird I was curious. I'm not sure how to handle this. Should I bring it up? Am I being too paranoid? Any advise would be welcome.

[robowarrior]

Problem with ldr is that you can't check what the other person is doing, so you have no means of preventing that he goes with other girls, wether it be chatting ,dating etc. And then you come to the essensial of the story, namely ldr can only work out if the two people decided to come to live together forever for good. If you aren't together, you might as wel consider yourself separated. Thats why its usually adviceable to find a partner within your inner circle of reach. Im definitly not sure if you should go back with him, but if you go with someone make sure that you can make it a permanent stay in which you are together, instead of being separated by thousands of miles of land or ocean.

[Joneysnai]

hey there, i am not sure how serious he is taking the relationship you have with him but based on his actions of still going to that site it doesn't sound like he takes it as a serious relationship. have u asked him why he still goes on the site and or what his purpose is? has he developed friendships from that website?

 

in order for a ldr to work you have to really communicate all the time about what you are feeling, what your daily life is like because that is the only thing you do have. that's how you become closer with eachother is to have open, honest communication. it doesn't sound like u guys have much of that but i could be wrong. trust me on this, it's so crucial. i have been in my ldr for 19 months now and he is in sweden, so we are in two different countries.

 

i think u should definitely ask him what his purpose is and how serious he takes the relationship u have with him. it's the only way you will find out. you never want to assume something else is going on, so the best thing to do is just ask. that's what i always do with my relationship. if i am not sure about something, i ask my boyfriend. saves a lot of fights and wrong impressions. hope this helps!