any good stories of growth?

[southpaw]

I was wondering if anyone had any constructive experience with dealing with a disparity in sex drives. My boyfriend is more of a once a week kind of guy and I'm more of a once a day. I don't like pestering him about it because it just makes him want to have sex less. Is anyone out there having sex less frequently than he/she wants but it's working out? (No hidden resentment/hostility). Has anyone had experience ignoring his/her libido? I guess I could just masturbate more...I know there are some people on this site that feel that differences in sex drive are insurmountable but I'd really like to hear from some of the experienced optimists out there.

[Boughs]

My ex was a nympho. But I like it close to once a day... so it worked out, but there were certainly times when she wanted it and I didn't and she would get really really hostile.. and likewise I would not have sex with her for a while.

 

Its all in the reaction... perhaps the less you think about it/mention it the better it can become... but at the same time, you want to fullfill what you are looking for. In my opinion, I couldn't date someone who wasn't as sexual as me.

[stkekeke]

Personally, I got nothing for you, but here's some people that have to go through the whole sex-drive disparity issue. I don't think your BF is asexual, but there are some people who have posted threads about their relationship with a big disparity and it's still working out.

 

link removed

[Scotcha]

Well, my relationship is almost on the same page as yours, at least as far as libido's are concerned. I'm a 3x per week kind of girl and he's a 1x per week kind of guy.

 

I used to pester him and sometimes it worked. That got pretty old though so now I don't pester him and once a week it is.

 

I don't feel... Resentful. But I do feel.. Somewhere between hungry and satisfied. It's not uncomfortable.. It's just not as much as I want.

 

I love him though, with my whole heart. I wouldn't trade my relationship with him for the best sex in the world that exponentially increases in orgasmic pleasure each and every night. To me, he means more.

 

I suppose I could masturbate more too. But I don't, not in the truest sense. We found a compromise: I masturbate, he helps, even if it's just lying there next to me giving me cuddels and kisses. It works and pretty often I even end up getting what I want.

[southpaw]

I appreciate it. I hear a little bit of my situation in all of your posts, and once a week is certainly less of a compromise than once a year. Thanks again.