why my mind is playing me?

[Jian]

Today, I had to go subscribe to a winter class. Was expecting to go, register then out for lunch...

 

When I arrive at the registration local, theres 2 desks, one busy with a new customer and a second with a girl. I gave a quick look from the side and didn't find her really attractive. When she was finally free of the phone she ask me to come inside, then omg she was really pretty! My mind then turned off, I don't know why, this didn't happen to me probably since high school. I answered all her question, gave the cash, said thanks and then left.

 

On my way back, I was thinking, what the hell I just did and started to feel really bad. Why didn't I even try to initiate conversation? She even told me that the class was going to be difficult, I could have use that to talk more with her.

 

Im thinking that I should have go back, saying that I forgot my gloves or something. damn I feel dumb... I acted like a freaking robot. I'm usually not that numb with women, Im talkative on a dates and try to act friendly when I meet new one. I do feel awkward with total stranger but not if I have a reason to converse with her. Like today, she was there to help me, it should not have gone that bad.

 

How do you deal when you really regrets you didn't try to make a moves. And How to keep alert all the time. I'm gonna hit myself if my mind switch off like that again. Maybe I was too surprised by how I feel toward her beauty, I dont know.

[Jeffrey2095]

Hello jian,

 

I do the same thing. We are blessed with 20/20 hindsight eh?

 

Are you maybe afraid of rejection, and maybe that's why your mind freezes?

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with trying to look her up and maybe inventing some subtrifuge to converse and get near her.

 

Now you have some time to formulate a good plan.

 

Maybe someday you will tell her about this and you will both laugh while you bounce your firstborn on your knee.

 

Go for it man, and keep us posted.

 

Good luck

[Jian]

thanks Jeffrey

 

No its not rejection, I have been a couple of times in my life, and I learned to not take this personally. I have been recently in fact and except disappointment It didn't bother me much.

 

I recently started to think that maybe I'm too self-conscious. I was a shy teenager but growing up I really matured and I don't think Im more shy than the average now.

 

I think Im too conformist and I'm scare to displease those I feel interested to, specially the ladies. I know its easy to say, don't think what she will think of you just go, but I think that sometime that bad side wins over the courageous side and my mind freeze and don't know what to say anymore.

[Jeffrey2095]

I once had a similar circumstance that didn't work out, not that yours won't.

 

I was in Tower Records years ago. I had been alone too long. I saw a pretty girl thumbing through the CDs (they had just come out then) and I said to myself, "I'm tired of being alone... Jeffrey, you are going to go over to that girl, and by hook or crook you are going to get her phone number!"

 

I actually mustered the confidence to do so, and got her number.

 

I was ecstatic, but kept my cool.

 

Well, like I say, it didn't work out, but it showed me that it is far better to try, and maybe be shot down, then sit there all alone farting in a mud puddle.

 

You got nothing to lose... fake it.

 

And remember... SHE doesn't know what is going on in your mind.

 

Peace buddy