The worst thing about a breakup

[jjjacer]

Hi long time no post, its been 2 years since the last time me and my ex have been trully dating, so in total i have known her for 5 years. I guess some things will never change no matter how much we hope they do. The girl i was dating ended up coming back to me but then she just decided to date other people at the same time. I accepted this but will always regret it. She finnally said the words i think all people hate to here when someone breaks up with you. "I love you, but as a friend". These words are probably the most painful you will ever hear, because i still love this girl(or now should i say woman). And whats worse she still wants to be friends. Come on is it bad enough i have to endure the pain of loss without being reminded everyday of it when she drops by, or even worse when she brings her new BF over. I guess what made this worse is the promise she broke when she did this, she ended up telling me that we are no longer together the day she moved away for 6 months. The promise we made was that if we ever were going to break up at least make the last week or so a happy one so that neither of us ended up hating the other (we had a few issues in the past were we both got real mad at each other). But instead of spending our last two weeks together as a couple, and enjoying the time we had together, she decided it was better to play on the computer, hang out with her friends, and party.

 

Ok i rambled on enough, i just needed to get this off my chest. I still love her but i dont think it will ever be what it once was. Sure i did end up being better than alot of her choices but it seems i will always come out in second place. I just cant wait till the day i can hear a love song on the radio without tears coming to my eyes.

[jjjacer]

any input?

[isidore]

It's better that you didn't spend those last 2 weeks together if it was ending! Good lord it would have made what you are going through so much worse. Don't be relegated to Friend Island if it will hurt you too much. Then again I'm sure every person is different. I've just found that if I couldn't stay with a person romatically, if there wasn't enough to keep us together as lovers, then why would there be enough to keep us friends? And just what kind of friends would we have been? The history would never allow us to be "best" friends. The best that could be hoped for was a casual acquaintance.

Do you really want to be reminded forever in person of what you lost? Or am I projecting my own thought too much?

Hope this helped.

[cordelia]

Its extremely painful when you realize that the person you love does not love you the same way. I'm so sorry you are going through this...the only way to get through this is by not seeing her or talking to her, for a while! Yes it will hurt like hell at first but those feelings will fade overtime. And in the meantime, why is she bringing her new BF over in front of you ? That is just plain cruel and you should not have to put up with that. Tell her to go stay somewhere else!

And as for spending your last week together as a happy couple, that would probably hurt more than you realize. like you're creating more happy memories together and then saying good bye to the relationship forever.

Hang in there, it does get better but you have to start by distancing yourself from the situation that is causing you the pain.

Take care and at least you know you can always come to this site for advice!