jmantra Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I sit here at this computer alone I walk down the street alone I eat at restaraunts alone I drive alone I watch TV alone I go the movies alone I go over all my hopes and dreams alone I ponder the meaning and purpose of my life alone I will live in a country house on the praire alone I get caught in the abyss alone I will die alone Link to comment
NKP Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Loved it, i could really relate to it alot Link to comment
forza2 Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I sit here at this computer alone I walk down the street alone I eat at restaraunts alone I drive alone I watch TV alone I go the movies alone I go over all my hopes and dreams alone I ponder the meaning and purpose of my life alone I will live in a country house on the praire alone I get caught in the abyss alone I will die alone I Absolutely hate it. Link to comment
AnotherBrokenDoll Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I like it, although sad it does state feelings and thats what poetrys about! Link to comment
arwen Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I think it's a good poem. It expresses the feeling of lbeing alone, and esp. the feeling that you are alone regardless of what you are doing. To the OP, do you think that you'd write the same also if someone was there with you? That it's possible to feel as alone as you are when you are alone, even when someone is next to you? To me that is the difference between being alone and being lonely. I am mostly alone, but almost never lonely. Do you intend this as a sad poem or do you feel that being alone is not always a bad thing? To forza2, you are of course entitled any opinion you have but what is it that you hate about it? Just curious. Ilse Link to comment
Fallout Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Maybe he hates that it doesn't rhyme or it's not mellodious...sure it's not a great poem from the artistic point of view but I like it it gets through the screen with the feeling it expresses...like kita I can also relate to it Link to comment
jmantra Posted November 1, 2006 Author Share Posted November 1, 2006 The poem was to express myself because I am alone for the most part. I don't have many friends and although I enjoy the solitude sometimes I get lonely. Link to comment
ForAnother Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 So I don't understand this, are you trying to say you are alone? I think you hammer at the "underlying meaning" of the poem with your words. Thats why it cannot be considered "artistic" however, all poetry is art in my eyes. Do I enjoy this poem? no. But we all find what we will from it, and I'm glad some did. -ForAnother Link to comment
chai28jm Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 the peom was bad to, me.. just seem like you just did because you were bored.. more than lonely Link to comment
jmantra Posted November 2, 2006 Author Share Posted November 2, 2006 Jesus f*** christ I didn;t make that poem for you guys critique it, I made it because I am feeling lonely, nobody has time for me anymore and I have a non existant love life. I thought this was supposed to be a support site thanks ENA:sad: Link to comment
NKP Posted November 2, 2006 Share Posted November 2, 2006 Hey dont worry what people say about it okay hun, i love it, it was really great and could relate to it alot Link to comment
ForAnother Posted November 2, 2006 Share Posted November 2, 2006 Very sorry What did you mean by posting this? Did you aim to get an approval? Poetry is like watching a film, everyone will have an opinion of its enjoyment. If you wished to express your aloneness and get some help do so in a normal post under the appropriate category. I think with the poetry section an open mind is in order. -ForAnother Link to comment
AnotherBrokenDoll Posted November 2, 2006 Share Posted November 2, 2006 People are here to support you. Some people are just very honest. Don't worry. There are always going to be people who like your work and those who don't. Alot of the people i concider best mates do not like my work. Its very individual. As i have said i really like it though as to me it does express the way you feel well... We are all here for you to talk to about anything. And thats what this site is aboput but people will share there honest opinion. Link to comment
chai28jm Posted November 3, 2006 Share Posted November 3, 2006 hey man read your peom again .. ieven made my mom read it.. she love it.. but i did really get.. but after reading it some more,, i guess i was alittle slow i got it.. and think about it not a bad peom.. i thought at frist it was too plain.. but when look at it that what i was peom about.. just be plain and alone.. no life too it.. which being alone does express.. sorry for my comment earlier.. p.s not every one going to love your work but that dont me should get angry.. every one is different .. plus honest feed back is alway better than some one lieing to you. just hang in there Link to comment
Recommended Posts