I'm so frustrated he is playing games with me

[mysteriousGIRL]

I am so frustrated. I am beginning to hate him. One minute he is freaken doing all these things to make it seem like he still cares and another minute he is cold as hell. He would do all kinds of sweet things like bring me food to work and suprising me. Or wait till i get home late and night just to catch up on watching movie with me.

 

Once he gets me in his arm and i warm up to him instead of ignoring him he would turn into this cold jerk and make it seem like im the one who wanted him. I am so frustrated!!!

[Relationship Coach]

...and what does he say when you ask him about his behavior?

 

RC

[mysteriousGIRL]

i don't because i know he is just going to act all cocky, and play stupid.

[missmebaby]

wow i am going through the exact same thing as you and i am just as confused and frustrated. one day he will act like he really wants to see me and wants to work things out. he'll take me out to dinner and a movie, he'll act like he actually cares about me. then the next day he'll be distant and cold with me, pick fights, act like he doesnt care whether i stay or go. ive tried everything but its been a whole month of this. ive talked to him a million times about the way hes acting but like you said, he just gets cocky and acts like hes not doing anything wrong and im just imagining things. since im going through the same thing and im just as confused as you i dont really know what to tell you.

 

i have a few ideas. you can either try to talk with him about it and see how that goes, you could try doing what he is doing. just act cold and whenever you're around him act like you are distracted and ignore him. dont touch him, dont start up a conversation, if he says something to you or asks you something act like you are more interested in the TV or something and take a few seconds to answer him back. if you talk to him on the phone dont talk a whole lot and get off the phone quickly. i tried this and it actually worked for awhile. i think he realized he might lose me and he started to pay more attention to me and kept asking me if i still wanted him and kept asking me why i was acting different. but just be careful not to take it too far like i did and cause a huge fight and ruin everything.

 

another idea is to give him an ultimatum. tell him he needs to stop treating you like this and needs to make up his mind about what he wants and stop playing games with you or you're going to walk away and never look back. then if nothing else works like in my case you're just going to have to act like you dont care about him anymore, let him know you're moving on, tell him you cant take it anymore, your sick of trying so hard and getting nothing in return, and tell him that hes just wasting your time and holding you back from finding a good guy. tell him you dont think you two should talk anymore. that way maybe he will realize that hes about to really lose you and he'll realize its his fault. if he ends up calling you sometime then its up to you to decide what you want to do and the control is in your hands now instead of his, and if he doesnt call you then you know he didnt really care about you anyway...and is that the kind of guy you want to be with anyway?