2 questions about a small situation.

[Demonblade]

I'll just try to keep it short. Me and this girl have been friends for a few years now and we are very close. For the past few months I've had a crush on her. Me and her were hanging out (just us) and I admitted my feelings towards her. I asked her on a date the next day. She said yes. She told me on the date that she wasn't doesn't want to be in a relationship until after graduation. I asked if she would be interested in being in a relationship with me after graduation and she said "If you're still interested, yes". But we're going on a second date next Tuesday.

 

My two questions (these may be a bit stupid to ask, but I just want to be sure)

 

1) Is she interested?

 

And

 

2) Does this mean we're friends with benefits?

[rightfromthestart]

hard to pick sometimes eh

 

 

i'm the kind of girl who is much better off ignoring her old flames, and pretending they don't exist. even though i hate going that route, i think it's healthier for me. that's why i cut kris out of my life, and i'm lucky darren never replied to the email i sent him.

 

in the list of my old flames - boyfriends worth mentioning and significant crushes - here is the breakdown of noteworthy or recent relationships:

 

darren: his naivete drives me insane, but he is damn fine, and i have trouble ignoring that. if i started talking to him again i'd only want to get back together with him. BAD idea. he can't deal with a woman that is scared and a mess, but is not wating to be saved by someone else from it.

 

nick: he's not as spoiled as i thought he was. he was arrogant. still is probably. talks WAY too much. thinks he knows more than i can deal with for very long. but since we've broken up he's gotten fine. and i don't think it's just a change of perspective. there is some physical evidence of it. but aside from the above, there is the detail that made me stop thinking he was spoiled - i CANNOT STAND his sister.

 

jesse: the man is loaded with charisma. he has a good heart. and he's smart. but he ain't wise. and he's been known to think with his penis. he's got no passion for anything. in hindsight, there was no passion in the sex either. the danger in any significant interaction with him is i'd end up very sexually frustrated, or we'd end up sleeping together and based on his lack of passion, i'd STILL be very sexually frustrated.

 

8 foot tall boy: okay, it's not an emotional thing. it's purely a sexual thing. he's immature, and inarticulate, and he doesn't realize just how much he has left to learn. actually, come to think of it, that's true of him, and all the previous boys mentioned. i seem to pick them that way, i gotta watch out for that in the future. but being in contact with him at all makes me think i should just jump him and relieve myself of some of my sexual frustration. use him like a vibrator, basically. but unlike a vibrator, he'd be upset when i didn't call. too bad, he's cheaper than a vibrator.

 

kris: i think this is self explanitory, but it's a simple case of keeping in contact with him keeps me believing there is a possibility that he could care about me the way i cared about him. and everytime i think i'm over him and try to be friends again, i just end up right back where i started, so that's enough. no more of that. i don't need the disappointment. he can't love me and i can't not love him. yes, i'm sure that thought makes lexie shudder.

 

and then finally, there is

 

graham: i am two and a half years older than this guy. and i've wanted him since the day i set eyes on him. granted, when i set eyes on him, i didn't realize that there was any kind of notable age difference between us. maybe i was a year older, but two and a half? he does NOT look it, and he doesn't act it either. the way i described him to my sister, he has the face of a renaissance angel. he is gorgeous, easy going, and he also has a passion for volunteering. he just finished up being akela of the 8th ottawa cub pack. akela is a big deal. big job. he's gone to laurier now, for percussion, and we're talking more over the internet. and we shouldn't, because talking to him makes me want him. i hadn't seen him since christmas, and i wanted him then, then i started seeing nick, and put him out of my head, and now, i'm back to wanting him...

 

the moral of this story is i should stop talking to the men i've had a history with. seriously. all it does is make me want them back. no matter how many reasons we had not to be together.

[Scotcha]

She may not be viewing your second date as an actual "date". If she has said that she does not want a relationship I would listen to her words instead of getting my hopes up over confusing and mixed signals.

 

Right now she just may want a friend.

 

I wouldn't wait around for her. Live your life and continue your friendship. It might go somewhere, it might not and there is no sense in holding out for something so uncertain.

[Demonblade]

She may not be viewing your second date as an actual "date". If she has said that she does not want a relationship I would listen to her words instead of getting my hopes up over confusing and mixed signals.

 

Right now she just may want a friend.

 

I wouldn't wait around for her. Live your life and continue your friendship. It might go somewhere, it might not and there is no sense in holding out for something so uncertain.

 

I am continuing our friendship. I think it will go somewhere because after our first date she kissed me and told me that I was the only person she would have gone out with.

 

Well, one of her friends asked her if we were dating and she said that we are dating exclusively. What does this mean?

 

Would it be bad if I tried to find out from her if she is interested, just not ready?