sagirl Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Anyone that has been following my posts, thank you for your input and comments. I think they have finally sunk in. Yesterday I didn't feel so great. It was 5 months since the split. He came around to see us lastnight and we had a really good talk. Sorted out a couple of things, he even apologised for letting new gf babysit, said he knows it was a mistake, won't do it again, and that he knows how it must have made me feel because he wouldn't have liked it if the other way around. I woke up today and felt like a different person. It has finally sunk in that there is nothing I can do to change things, I have done all I can. I now realise that anything that is going to happen, will happen regardless of what I say or do. I think I have accepted that he has a new gf, that he is thinking of her, not me (they are going on holiday together on Friday). I know that they will have a good time while they are away and he wont be thinking about me. I have seen that he was stringing me along this whole time, be it consiously or sub-consiously. I was hanging around just waiting for him. I don't think I want to do that anymore. See, that wasn't so hard to write. I am not going to hang around waiting anymore. I am not yet ready to be with someone else, the thought still repulses me, but I am going to make an effort to change that. If he comes to his senses and I am still available, then that is fine. I would still take him back in a heartbeat, but I am not waiting anymore. I could be waiting forever. I have had enough of moping around, being depressed, constantly crying, and trying to put a brave face on for people. I hope this new energised me will be here to stay. I know there will be bad days ahead, but today is a good day and I just wanted to share it. Link to comment
PRSOV Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hi, I think it is wonderful that things are looking up for you and that you can now concentrate on your future, however I just want to ask you a question: If he split up with his current girlfriend and wanted you back would you get back together with him? Link to comment
sagirl Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 Yes I would. I still love him with all of my heart. I do know though that I can't force it to happen. I just have to let things run their course. I also now know that even if they do split up, it may not mean good news for me. It has taken a while, but it has finally sunk in. If it happens, then that would be wonderful. Link to comment
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