Feeling a bit left out

[Ms. Babydoll]

Ok so heres the deal. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 5 months and I got to say, this is the first serious relationship I've ever had.

Things are going pretty well between us, we enjoy the moments we have together and we miss each other when we're apart but I can't help but feel a bit left out.

He's been spending a lot of time with this friend of his (it's a male so there is nothing to worry about there) but it still seems to frustrate me a lot. For example, usually in the mornings Id go to my bfs house to spend time with him, but now this friend of his goes instead. At school when I want to spend sometime with my boyfriend, his friend is always there and always butts in while I'm in the middle of a sentence, in the end my bf and his friend walk off and I'm always left standing on my own. My boyfriend hardly finds time for me these days, I don't allow myself to be needy though, when I'm with him I pretend like everything is normal but when I'm alone I sometimes wish we'd spent more time together during the day.

What I really think the problem is, is his friend. I'm not into the whole idea of breaking a friendship up, I don't want to get in the way of their bond but it seems like they are always together these days. I know boys will be boys and need their time with their friends to just fool around and do the regular stuff guys do but his friend always seems to be there these days, I can hardly remember the last time I saw my boyfriend without his friend by his side.

All I know is, whenever his friend is there I feel left out because he always steals my thunder and my boyfriend is always distracted by him, maybe I'm working myself up about nothing but I feel really alone lately and I guess I just need advice on how to tell him how I'm feeling about all this.

Sorry if this was confusing and long, it's late...

[avman]

Well I would just tell your boyfriend how you feel. Tell him that you understand that he really likes his friend and that you know they want to spend some time together, but that right now you are feeling a bit left out. Ask him for some special time just for the two of you, and then he can set aside some time just for him and his friend.

 

I would definitely bring up the part about him and his friend walking off and leaving you alone and let him know how that feels for you. I doubt he realizes just how that affects you so talk to him about it.

 

This shouldn't be an angry conversation or anything that would jeapordize your relationship. You just need to keep the communication flowing.

 

Most importantly, do NOT make it a you vs his friend conversation. If you make him choose one or the other, it will not go well. Keep it strictly about how you really feel and what you need.

[nottoogreen]

Is your bf less affectionate as well, like less cuddling, kissing..? If so, could he have gayish interests?

[Ms. Babydoll]

He's still affectionate towards me, but I just wish his friend would push off for a bit, realize that I need my bf much more than he does!!

 

Thanks for hte advice avman