I think I miss the relationship more than I miss her

[blindreepr]

Now that I look back on my thoughts the past couple of days I think I realize that what I am missing is the relationship, not the actual person. We didn't have a bad relationship, there were a few things missing but it wasnt bad. It wasn't enough for her I guess, but I was happy with it. The things I don't miss are her lack of intiative, her cursing, her farting, her reliance on me for all things, her needyness. I miss having a supportive partner, but I dont miss her.

[permasmile]

I agree with you. I believe I am in the same boat. I miss having someone to talk to each day, someone to cuddle with, knowing someone is thinking of you etc. That isn't to say I do not miss her at all......obviously our ex's have good qualities. But in my case I am struggling with the idea of being single more so than not being with her.

[Allie.]

Hahaha. cute post. "her farting..etc.." haha.

 

Of course. we ALL love the feeling of being loved and having someone to support us and love us through all the days of our lives. It is completely normal to feel that way. I miss lots of relationships. Even when I don't have a mere "crush" on anyone..I still miss the feeling of being loved and having a supportive partner. Its okay though. You'll find someone else who will be a supportive partner minus the cursing, farting and needyness.=D

 

always,

Allie.

[gaiden]

I think a good majority of the people here right now fall under this category. It is very painful during the beginning of a breakup to realize that.

 

In my situation, I know this is the truth. I don't miss the actual person, I miss the situations. I miss having someone next to me while I sleep. I miss someone calling me to ask how my day is going, I miss someone packing me lunches and leaving me little notes. I miss the dreams that I had planned for myself and my significant other.

 

Do I miss my ex, to a degree, yes... but as time goes on, the lilly pads on the pond start to separate and I can see deep down into that pond and I start to see exactly what it is that I miss. I wish I could get there faster, but I know it will take as long as it needs to.

[Allie.]

I agree with you. I believe I am in the same boat. I miss having someone to talk to each day, someone to cuddle with, knowing someone is thinking of you etc. That isn't to say I do not miss her at all......obviously our ex's have good qualities. But in my case I am struggling with the idea of being single more so than not being with her.

 

I think what you need is NC because NC helps us realize that we'll be "okay" without them. Not "great" but "okay". I posted a thread about NC a week ago or something. I'll give you the link and maybe it'll help =D

 

 

 

always,

Allie.

[brando]

Yes, i read that somewhere, that what is missed the most is the company of the opposite sex after a break up. You seem to have a good handle on this. Best of luck.

[itseuphoric]

i think we can all at some point relate to this. the nice thing about missing the relationship and not the person is...well, the person most likely isn't coming back, but you can always start a new relationship with someone and get everything you ever wanted from that.

just look forward to what you can have, and not what you had. best wishes

[blindreepr]

I think what you need is NC because NC helps us realize that we'll be "okay" without them. Not "great" but "okay". I posted a thread about NC a week ago or something. I'll give you the link and maybe it'll help =D

 

 

 

always,

Allie.

 

thanks for the link, today will be day 5 of NC