will telling him ruin our friendship?

[pitterpatter]

my ex and i dated for two years, broke up about a year ago, and are now the VERY BEST of friends. of course ive still got lots of feelings for him and i want to be with him. right now, we act JUST LIKE boyfriend and girlfriend minus anything physical. no kissing, touching, etc. but yet we see each other for hours every day, talk on the phone when we aren't together, etc.

 

is it worth it to bring it up to him that i want to be with him or do you think it will ruin our friendship? i know that if he doesnt feel the same way, if we continue to hang out how we hang out he'll feel like hes leading me on. i'm so scared and dont know what to do.

 

how can you pretty much act like bf/gf but yet not be together?

[melrich]

i know that if he doesnt feel the same way,

 

Do you have any inkling that he feels the same way?

 

If you don't I wouldn't tell him.

[pitterpatter]

sometimes i think he feels the same way, because he makes comments about me and other guys i was kind of "seeing" this past semester and it shows me that it bothers him which, to me, shows that he cared. actually, he's admitted that being around me and other guys i'm seeing bothered him.

 

also, a part of me believes that he HAS to feel that our friendship is just like our relationship. it seems so obvious to me. we have this committment to each other, in a way.

[Blue Skittles]

What was the reason for the breakup? He is definitely showing jealousy about you seeing other guys, but that might be just cuz he isn't seeing anyone else at the moment too. If you think he might like you too I would talk to him about how you feel.

[pitterpatter]

i just wasnt the best girlfriend at the time. i never cheated or lied to him or anything, i was just kind of selfish and prideful in arguments and stuff. since then i have matured SO much and he's said he's taken notice of it.

[Blue Skittles]

K, well if u guys are best friends then I would definitely bring this up, it has been a year and maybe u guys can try to make it work again. If he doesn't want to its ok it might be awkward at first but you guys will still be friends and you will be able to let your feelings go and move on with a peace of mind.

[pitterpatter]

thanks for your advice. i appreciate it.

[hk87]

Sometimes I don't understand when a guy and girl are best friends, why they aren't dating. It seems to make sense. If they have so much in common, and there must be an attraction of a certain extent.... Most are just too scared to make the move from friendship to b/f, g/f!

Sorry, that was a bit off topic. Anyway, you've been out before, you still remained friends, he's jealous of your other guys, I say ask him out, and if your best friends and he doesn't feel the same, it won't affect your relationship. I was friends with a guy for a few weeks, I told him how I felt, he didn't feel the same, but we got over it and were talking the next day like nothing had happened. We just happened to have grown apart now though.

 

Hk87

[shorty20]

I would tell him. The risk of rejection is a whole lot easier to deal with then wondering what if for the rest of your life. Go for it!

[pitterpatter]

thanks a bunch! i think i might!