Keeping that just starting to date feeling...

[Insects Destroy]

..does anybody manage this?

 

It is always so great when you first start dating and find out more and more about the other person, but eventually we soak up all their information.

 

How do you, keep things moving?

[RayKay]

Why are people so scared about that next phase? I would not want to keep that "just began dating feeling" as then you would never really get to that next great part. It's like when you are eating a sundae with the cherry on top. The cherry is great, but dig deeper down and you find all sorts of other great surprises as you go on. Alright, not a great analogy, but the point is that stage where you feel like your are in a partnership, not just dating, is a great one.

 

That is when things really start getting good (well in the right relationship!). That is when feelings move from the lust, to the love, to a deeper bond. You can still keep things exciting by continuing to date, and my maintaining your own life too (so you have more to talk about and learn from each other!).

 

There is always more to learn about someone. We start thinking there isn't when we get complacent, take things for granted, or just stop being individuals.

[renaissancewoman101]

I think people are scared about that phase because a lot of times new relationships dont make it past that phase and maybe the person has had a few relationships in the past where it died out at that phase. So, the person would rather preserve the relationship at the beginning, heady, butterflies in your stomach, phase.

 

If I were to get into a relationship soon, I rather rush the beginning stages of a relationship and get to the stage where we are more bf/gf and there is more of a spoken committment to each other as a dating couple. In the beginning, everybody is unsure about things and there is a bigger chance of things crashing and burning.

[RayKay]

I think people are scared about that phase because a lot of times new relationships dont make it past that phase and maybe the person has had a few relationships in the past where it died out at that phase. So, the person would rather preserve the relationship at the beginning, heady, butterflies in your stomach, phase.

 

If I were to get into a relationship soon, I rather rush the beginning stages of a relationship and get to the stage where we are more bf/gf and there is more of a spoken committment to each other as a dating couple. In the beginning, everybody is unsure about things and there is a bigger chance of things crashing and burning.

 

Well, most relationships WILL die out after the honeymoon stage. I have had plenty that did so too. This can last anywhere from a couple months, to a year or so. Anyway, if that were not the case that most did not make it past this stage, this forum would likely not even be around

 

You can't preserve the lust phase all the time - it is a very physiological thing, with oxytocin/endorphins being released. If we spent life like that we would never get anything done!

 

I don't think rushing through the beginning stage is the answer though, that stage is part of the bonding process. Why would you rush through things you were still unsure about after all. I think the risk of crashing and burning is even higher if you rush things faster than they are developing naturally personally. It's like booking the wedding chapel before you even go on the first date