for me this is really hard

[saku]

i haven't posted in awhile but my situation is still the same. i've been talking to this girl i like for a few months now. it hasn't been easy cause i'm not real good at being social. but i'm slowly finding myself opening up and being less nervous. i've sorta let her know how i wanted to do something like a movie but she hasn't said yes or no. i think it's cause i haven't asked directly. also, like i said....i'm not real social and that means i'm not as good at this as most guys. so i decided to do something for her that i can at least half way do good and that's writing. i'm going to write her a short story and not only am i putting my heart into it, i'm gonna try to make it look like a book(if that makes sense) i gave her a sneak peek of it but i havn't really told her it's especially for her. last week she gave me her number(didn't even ask for it) and i was happy but i was scared too because the last girl i liked really hurt me. she didn't like me cause i wasn't like all these other guys who call girls ho's and are disrespectful. whenever i would call her, she would put me on hold for a long time and when i did call back(she would tell me to call her back) she wouldn't even pick up. i think that sucked because in this society i'm worthless if i do things like write poems and treat a girl nice while some thug guy is respected for being a jerkface and cheating on girls(i guess girls do it to.) i really am tired of being hurt and i really want to spend more time with this girl i like now, i'm just afraid all these other guys have a better chance than me. i hope someone understands the fear i have. sorry if it all sounds dumb though. bye for now

[babycristy456]

You sound like a great guy and a great catch for any nice girl. If a girl doesn't appreciate you for being nice and would prefer a jerk, then let her have a jerk...she's the one missing out! Just make sure that you don't change and become a jerk or anything just to get the girls because later on, the girls are going to get tired to jerks and are going to want nice guys like you...

Nice guys are one out of a million so pat yourself on the back!

[bzborow1]

Hi there,

 

Well the previous poster is right, you shouldn't give up being a nice guy. But that doesn't mean you can't get more aggressive and be more confident with the ladies. Remember, women ALWAYS tell you they want a nice guy with intelligence and a sense of humor, but they always end up with idiots and jerks. 3 things to get a women: confidence, control, and be a challenge.

 

Also, you should check this article out....and before you do...JUST ASK HER ON A DATE!!!!

link removed

[Knctrnl22]

I am a guy and I want to say that I admire you. I admire you because you are shy but still find a way to communitcate with a girl. I believe that you nad I are a lot a like. I am also shy when it comes to females and I have also gotten my feelings hurt by women who want more aggresive jerk type guys. From what I read I know that you will do just find with this lady. Do what you feel is right and I sense that this girl will be around to get to know the real you underneath the shy shell. I just want to tell you to keep up the good work and be yourself even though jerks seem to do better they really don't.

[winkie]

Every girl wamts a nice guy but they end up going for a jerk becasue of how they carry themselves it is all how you perceive yourself. You need to be confident and think that you deserve not to be treated like that (previous ex). I really think confidence has something to do with it and if you know you are a nice guy and you treat ladies good then you should be confident in that you are great catch. Your confidence is lacking judging by the end of your email about it sounding dumb.......nothing you say can be dumb if it is something that you are concerned or think about no matter what it can not be dumb. Some girls may also not know you are interested if you are so shy to ask them.

[bzborow1]

"i'm not usually like this but i tend to get shy around you...."

[Colls]

Just to let u kno, I would kill for a guy like you. This world needs more guys who would do that for a girl. I think this girl you are into now, appreciates that and recognizes how great u are. Dont let her go. Dont change, always be urself. good luck - thx for helping me realize their are great guys out there. ~Colleen~

[oinmd]

You need to realize that you have nothing to lose by asking a girl out. I mean, if she says no, then she doesn't like you and it will just save you heart break later. I know it can hurt in the beginning, but women really like a man who is confident. I used to be really shy and had the same problem you are having now. I also remember talking to friends who were seeing guys who were pricks, but the reason those guys get girls is that they are confident.

 

If she gave you her number without you asking, then she is most likely interested. Try to find out what her interests are, and try to go out and do something together. If you start talking about movies or something and she says I would like to see that movie then ask her if she wants to go with you. If you are too shy with her, she may think you aren't interested, especially if she gave you her number and you havn't called her back. Call her and ask her if she wants to go for coffee or something. Personally I would hold off on the short story, unless you know that is something she likes. It is sometimes better to become good friends first and then get into the sappy stuff. Good luck.