Update :-(

[Clarkmeister]

For background please look at

 

It appears to be over !!!!

 

Pretty devastated after yesterday. I really thought that we'd sort it out but it is clear that the issue is with her and not me. She said again that the passion had gone and that she was too far down the line with her decision to try again. This is a trait of hers, she gets so far with a relationship then gets scared when it gets to the crunch. I think we've went further than she's ever been but still has this issue of commitment.

 

To be honest, I think she is having a battle in her head about this, thats why she has been still doing couple things even up till mid Jan because I think she really wants to move on but at the moment she doesn't know how to and has no-one to advise her how to either. I asked her yesterday if she thought that she had a problem getting close to people and commitment and she said that she probably did. I said that we can work on it but again she wasn't interested in doing so just now.

 

At the moment, I believe its over BUT I still hold a little glimmer of hope because I think deep down its the wrong decision and she knows it. If she can get herself sorted in time then I still believe we can have a very good future together. However, what I can't do is put my life on hold until she hits the wall, which she will do, but that might be a couple of months or 10 years.

 

My dad has advised me to try and do nothing about things for a couple of days. We have a house together and that is going to need sorting at some point but I'm not ready to do all that just yet.

 

Although we will need to get in contact to sort out the financial and domestic situation, I am going into total NC for now. My feelings are all over the place just now, I change from wanting to give it one last go at getting her back to drawing a line under it. I'm not going to do anything for now. Does anyone have any advice for me ??

[AwdreeHpburn]

Clarkmeister, I'm really sorry your meeting didn't go as you'd hoped.

 

I think you and your dad are right. Give yourself a day or two to get a little stronger and then get the financial stuff sorted out and over with. The less you have to contact her about in the future, the better.

 

I'm sorry you're in this spot. I hope its over smoothly and quickly for you.

[Clarkmeister]

Clarkmeister, I'm really sorry your meeting didn't go as you'd hoped.

 

I think you and your dad are right. Give yourself a day or two to get a little stronger and then get the financial stuff sorted out and over with. The less you have to contact her about in the future, the better.

 

I'm sorry you're in this spot. I hope its over smoothly and quickly for you.

Thanks for your kind words Ta_ree-saw. I am hurting just now and all I can think of today is her and wanting her to come back. Then my thoughts change to not liking what she is doing and drawing a line under it. It's all very raw just now but I am going to complete NC. We work for the same company but not together but are sometimes based in the same building. I know she is downstairs now and it's hurting like hell.