Men and bragging

[flnkpyn]

I was talking to this girl of interest (she knows me for about 8 months now and there's been flirting) and I kinda bragged about a material object. I know its something I should avoid but the conversation kinda got me going. So my question is (especially to the ladies) is that does this usually mean i hurt my chances? if you're interested in a guy, if he did brag this ONE TIME ONLY (becuase I never brag about material things until that instant), do you usually get turned off or do you look at it more if he does its all the time (brag all the time). I mean does ONE mistake usually break the deal or are most of you aware that when a guy does brag, he may be doing it beacuse he IS interested??

[Kevin T]

Ideally, it shouldn't hurt your chances. I think everyone's allowed at least one mistake. 'To err is human, to forgive is divine', as they say.

 

I can definitely say that continuing to brag is only going to cause problems, but just once... well, it could be a problem, but I think everyone deserves a second chance.

[PocoDiablo]

Once should not be a deal breaker, but bragging about stuff tends to telegraph that you feel you are of low self worth and have possessions to compensate in some way. It's like you are trying to manipulate a woman into liking you because of what you have, so it reeks of desperation. Women can smell that a mile away, and it's not usually an attractive thing.

 

Once? Yeah, you're fine.

 

More than once? Bad news....

[flnkpyn]

I dont know. I mean I didn't really realize that I bragged until later on but the more I think of it the more I kicked myself in the back and its tough cause I dont see her until 2-3 weeks from now so I have all these scenarios playing on my head. I really hit off with this one and we have so much in common.

 

Any thoughs from the ladies?

[flnkpyn]

um...where did all the ladies go? Just need some input gals just. I need women's input

[keenan]

Well...bragging isn't very cool, for sure. It often comes accross as insecure and self-centered. It depends on how obnoxious you were, though, LOL. It could just be in your head: *Sometimes* what seems like bragging to one person can be interpreted as enthusiasm or excitement by somebody else. If a guy is just really enthusiastic about something, it's fine, and it could even be kinda cute.

 

Wanna give more details?

[southerngirl]

Depends on what you were bragging about. I dont know that it was a deal breaker unless she appeared uncomfortable and you kept going on ... and ... on... and ... on. How long did you brag for? What was the object you were bragging about?

 

Details?

[flnkpyn]

It could just be in your head: *Sometimes* what seems like bragging to one person can be interpreted as enthusiasm or excitement by somebody else. If a guy is just really enthusiastic about something, it's fine, and it could even be kinda cute.

 

Wanna give more details?

 

I'm the kind of person that tries hard not to come accross as obnoxious, so when I did brag about something (yes it was out of enthusiasm and excitement; we were talking about something in common), I felt really bad and kept playing the scenario over and over in my head. She's known me for quiet awhile now and before that incident, I never bragged to her about anything but that was before I started to like her. Now its different, when you like someone its so hard to be yourself.

[southerngirl]

Just be yourself and try to relax a little bit. I know thats hard but it may not be a big deal at all. If she has known you a while then she may not have taken any offense.... unless of course you do this all the time.

[sweetheart230]

well its not great, but i always thought it was funny cause i knew with my ex that he was trying to impress me. in that context its cute, but then again when you like someone every little stupid thing they do is cute. but i'm getting off topic.

 

not terrible, just try to watch yourself so you don't come accross as arrogant. once is absolutely forgivable.

[keenan]

You could always add a little sentence into your next email or whatever with her: "Hey, I was thinking later about our last conversation, and I felt a little silly because it probably seemed like I was bragging about X. Sorry if I was being obnoxious...I get carried away sometimes. Next time just slap me."

 

That'd get it out there so you don't worry about it anymore. If she's thinking negative thoughts, the note should dispel them. But keep it light!!!! Try to be a little funny and self-deprecating, but NOT anxious or worried. Chances are, she's not even thinking about it, and you don't want to seem like you're over-analyzing things.